Sanctuary
by Rulisu
Summary: Demyx is new to Organization XIII and only Axel will give him the time of day, but hatred, deciet and a member hellbent on destroying the Organization may cut their time together short. Axel/Demyx. ATTN: Yaoi and language.
1. The Organization's number IX

Oh, herro! I'm Rulisu! At least that's what they call me in my own little world where everyone loves me.

Basically, I suck at summaries! Hooray!

Summary: Demyx is new to Organization XIII, and everyone but a certain flamboyant redhead doesn't even acknowledge his existence. There's just something about Axel that Demyx can't resist. And while Demyx struggles with his feelings for Axel, a mutinous force festers in the heart of the Organization that threatens to destroy them all.

See? What I tell ya?

Disclaimer: I by no means own Kingdom Hearts or any of the characters. If I did, Axel, Zexion and Demyx would be my cabana boys and Riku would serve me fine liquor on bended knee. And none of them would wear shirts. And since that is clearly not the case (much to my dismay), it can be rightfully assumed that I am making no money off of this, and I will give the boys back to their rightful owners as soon as I'm done playing with them.

A/N: I believe that art should inspire art. So I thought I'd take a moment to say that the songs "Sanctuary" by Utada Hikaru, and "I will follow you into the dark" by Death Cab for Cutie were the inspirations for this fic. And of course, I had "Zombie" by The Cranberries on repeat the entire time I was writing. I'd also like to add that yes, our foul language is now present in the world of Kingdom Hearts, as is smoking. Now that I'm done rambling...enjoy!

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"**The Organization's number IX"**

The room was considerably brighter than one would expect, given the circumstances, but it was just as cold and had a creepy and depressing air to it that made Demyx sick to his stomach.

"This is where we spend most of our time." said a man in a black cloak identical to Demyx's. He walked beside him, motioning to the cavernous room around them, practically chirping as he served as a makeshift tour guide.  
"And over there is Xemnas's quarters. If you value your existence, you'll keep as far away from there as possible unless he summons you." There was a mixture of fear and respect in his voice as his eyes flitted over the large white door adorned with jewels that sparkled dimly in the piercing light.

Demyx nodded, tendrils of his blond hair falling in his face, the metal around his neck clinking against the metal of the large zipper that ran down his front. It all seemed to glow in the unnatural radiance of this place. Most ironic. Demyx's pale blue eyes began to haze and his guide caught sight of the far off look.

"It can be overwhelming, but don't let it get to you. You're a part of something much bigger now. Much better. Much more important than you could ever hope to be before. You're a part of something great, a search for a purpose. For meaning. Your chance existance will no longer be a vain search for the other half of the whole you once were." sighed the man, as if his own words could make him swoon. Demyx winced internally. That struggle... that need to be. That un-slakable lust for purpose... he knew it all too well.

"Saix, your speech gets fruiter with each new member." a sarcastic voice floated into Demyx's small, delicately shaped ears...

It's sound was simply intoxicating. Like warm cream and honey, wrapped in velvet and dipped in the finest liquor. Every syllable spoken made it harder for Demyx to breathe. The words seemed to grab hold of every nerve ending in his body and tug with a hard, firm, delightful grip. Demyx felt goosebumps rise along the flesh of his arms, an odd sensation against the fabric of his robe.

"No one asked you, smartass." Saix remarked through gritted teeth at the voiced shadows up ahead. There was a soft, amused chuckle from the darkness, every bit as exquisite as the spoken words.

"When do they ever?" inquired the darkness. Saix heaved a sigh. From the shrouded corridor steppede a man, tall and lean with a broad chest and liquid eyes that would put the most beautiful emerald to shame. He wore the same robe as Demyx and Saix, but it seemed to flow from him, around him. His black leather gloved hands looked strong where they hung at his side. His lips were as perfectly shaped as the rest of him, strong, defined and effeminately beautiful. His hair was perhaps the most incredible feature. It was a deep, fiery red darkening to black near the roots. It was long and spiked in the most peculiar, though flattering manner. And below his eyes... oh those eyes... there were two upside-down teardrop scars. One for each glowing, apple-green orb. The muscles in the man's Adonis-like face now pulled the corners of his perfect mouth into a smirk and he now crossed his arms over his chest, looking expectantly to Saix who heaved a sigh of disgust, shooting a death-glare at the cloaked god to his right.

"This..." he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose with what almost looked like defeat and loathing "This is Axel, the Organization's number VIII."

Axel smiled proudly and extended a hand. "Welcome to Hell, number IX. Glad to have you on board!" he beamed. Demyx could only stare at Axel's hand, then back at his glorious face. He managed to speak.

"I...I was told there'd be more of us?" he asked feebly. Axel's face fell a little and he withdrew his hand.

"There will be more joining us shortly. In fact, I believe Luxord and another named Marluxia have already arrived." piped Saix.

"Who?" questioned Demyx blankly.

"Hand-picked ass kissers, compliments of Mansex. With more to come, no doubt." Axel said rather spitefully, closely examining the front of his robe.

"AXEL!" cried Saix angrily. Demyx only snickered.

"What?" he retorted. "They're bound to be ass-kissers to some extent." smiled the man with the flaming hair.

"Not that..." whined Saix. "The...'mansex' part." he said through gritted teeth.

"Oh he'll get over it." shrugged Axel.

"How we ever got stuck with the likes of _you_..." began Saix.

"Oh don't get your lacy undies in a bunch. We're all stuck here, we might as well enjoy it, right? And you know how you got stuck with me. I'm a bastard child of fate, just like you. We weren't meant to exist, so now we do our best to suffer through the days as heartless, soul-less beings longing for a purpose..." mumbled Axel, staring absently at the tile.

"You're so negative." groaned Saix. Axel gave him a piercing look over his shoulder.

"Yeah? And you're ugly." he quipped.

Saix was about to open his delicately shaped mouth to attempt to verbally reform Axel, but decided against it, settling for a frustrated grunt before he disappeared into a pillar of shadow. Demyx watched in amazement while Axel scoffed.

"Well that was rude." he chirped. "Looks like I'm your tour-guide now, buddy boy. Whaddya say to that?" Demyx felt a lead weight drop into his stomach though he was too blinded by the bright light of the hall and Axel's more than appealing features to fully comprehend why.

"Yay?" he responded on auto-pilot. Axel beamed ear to ear.

"Wonderful!" he cried eccentrically, pulling Demyx to his side. "Now... onward! To darkness and laughter and places of sleep and self gorging!" he continued as he began pulling Demyx along down the rest of the sparkling corridor.

Demyx wanted to go along with it, really he did. But he stopped in his tracks, feeling Axel pulling on him. He looked up at the man who was (sadly) considerably taller than he was.

"Did...did you ever know your other?" he asked in a sheepish tone. Axel resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"No." he sighed. "No I didn't. And way to kill the mood, newbie." he grunted, letting go of Demyx. Demyx instantly felt stupid for ruining something as wonderful as Axel's arm around him.

"Well there's uh...something in common." he attempted a smile. "So where do I sleep?" he asked with pseudo-cheerfullness. Axel quirked an eyebrow.

"Boy you just go from A to C without bothering to stop at B, don't you?" he asked, amused. Demyx blushed and nodded.

"I can't help it. I know it bugs people..." he almost felt like crying. Almost.

"Well, it doesn't bug me." beamed Axel, pulling Demyx to his side again. "Shall we?" he piped with feigned snobbery, motioning with a wide sweep of his arm at the hall laid out before them. Demyx smiled a small smile and nodded.

3 months later...

"Demyx!"Axel's unfailingly angelic voice drifted into Demyx's ear as he slept. Upon opening his tired eyes still stinging from a lack of sleep, he was met with Axel's own sparkling emerald irises, shining with a playfully malevolent fire that matched his powerful weapons.

"What? Waddya want?" Demyx mumbled sleepily.

"They're here!" Axel said excitedly. Nothing was sweeter than Axel's voice in his head when he woke up in the morning, but something about the high pitch and level of enthusiasm hinted at an impending early morning for Demyx.

"Who?" he asked, dreary.

"The last two members! They've finally arrived!" Axel seethed. Demyx sat up, scratching his head, the short strands falling into place beneath his fingernails. Beside his bed, Axel was practically trembling with excitement, fully dressed and smelling like a field of fresh lavender blooms after the rain. Demyx took a moment to examine his bed-raggled self, his hair uncombed and unwashed, sporting blue boxers and body oder, his robe flung carelessly on the floor. He stared up at Axel.

"You're way too happy about this." he winced. Axel shrugged.

"Well, DUH I'm happy about it!" his energy was through the roof. "We're officially one big, happy, slightly brain-damaged family! No more members need apply." Axel smiled.

"Brain damaged?" Demyx asked, offended.

"How much time have you actually spent around Laxaeus? He's the size of a wall and just about as smart as one." Axel murmured.

"Just because he doesn't talk much...unlike _some people_ who talk _too_ much." Demyx glared at the exuberant redhead hovering above him. Axel stuck his tongue out at him, then gazed at the floor thoughtfully.

"'Organization XIII'. That has such a nice ring to it." He smiled as Demyx yawned.

"Mhmm, fantastic. I'm going back to bed." he declared, smacking his pillow around to fluff out the ever-present dent.

"Nu-uh sleepin' beauty. Hate to break it to ya, but Mansex has demanded we all head out and meet the newbies. Something about number XIII being 'special'." Axel laughed. Demyx groaned and fell back against his pillow.

"But I'm tired." he whined. Axel sat on the edge of his bed and crossed his arms, giving Demyx a stern look.

"We're all tired, but there are no exceptions." He said regally. Demyx kept his eyes closed.

"But why? What's so special about these new freaks, anyway?" he groaned. He felt Axel's weight shift as he shrugged, heard the metal around his neck brush the zipper running down the full length of his robe.

"The one's a chick and the other has some kind of all powerful weapon?" Axel volunteered.

"How absolutely wonderful for them both." Demyx said sarcastically, still not opening his eyes.

"You don't think that's cool?" asked Axel.

"Axel..." began Demyx. "I control water...with a frickin' sitar, ok? A sitar. You have flaming chakarams and..." he let out an exasperated sigh. "Need I go on?" he asked of the redhead, who shrugged.

"You prove a valid argument..." said Axel, agreeing. Demyx nodded.

"Thank you." he sighed.

"But you still have to go." Axel smiled deviantly.

Demyx rolled over and began loud, fake snoring noises into his pillow. Axel laughed and slapped his back playfully.

"C'mon, don't be such a baby. I can go start a nice, cold shower for you if you'd like." he offered.

Demyx propped himself up on his elbows and stared at Axel.

"Are you implying that I smell?" he asked, offended. Axel's eyes gleamed.

"That, and I thought a shower might cheer ya up, waterboy." he grinned.

"Oh, go...blow something up." Demyx mumbled, waving Axel away.

"Hmph..." chuckled Axel, plucking Demyx's robe from the floor and tossing it at his fellow denizen of darkness. "Get the lead out, DemDem." he smiled, heading for the doorway. Demyx watched as he moved like liquid silk through the door. He waited until he could no longer hear Axels booted footfalls on the slick tile before he let out his breath. Every time Axel left his sight, he seemed to take Demyx's stomach with him. And a little piece of the heart he didn't even posses. He bit back the pain of knowing he'd never, ever be able to tell Axel that. Demyx searched blindly on his night stand until he wrapped his tired fingers around a slightly crushed pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out and placed it between his soft lips. Demyx was just about to light the tip when a pillar of shadow erupted in the corner of his dark room.

"You want to not do that?" came an irritated voice. Demyx didn't bother to look back.

"Shut your face, Saix. I'm not in the mood for one of your lectures." Demyx snapped, lighting his cigarette. Saix moved forward to stand beside Demyx's bed.

"I could really care less about your pointless habit. By all means, smoke your brains out. I was talking about the absolutely ridiculous amount of time you spend thinking about..._him_."he sneered, motioning to the doorway with a jerk of his graceful head.

"And just how is that any of your business?" Demyx questioned, the words slightly muffled by the cigarette in his mouth as he pulled on a pair of black pants, still in bed.

"Your petty yearning. The pathetic attempts at feelings your memories conjure...it gives me a splitting headache." contempt crawled along the edges of Saix's smooth tone. Demyx pulled a tight-fitting black shirt over his head, but said nothing. "Did you hear me?" Demanded Saix. Demyx swung his legs over the side of the bed and began pulling on his boots.

"Stay out of my head and we won't have this problem." he mumbled coldly.

"Do you think I _want_ images of the waste of space running through my head? I can't stand Axel. And I've told you before, I can't control that... aspect of me." Saix complained.

"Sounds like a personal problem..." mocked Demyx, refusing to look at the blue haired man in front of him.

"But I must admit...being the only other person to know about your sick little love interest is... amusing." Saix said, his voice like ice. "What must it be like? Knowing you can't tell him? Knowing that even if you did tell him, the sentiment wouldn't be returned because..." he let out a faux gasp "we don't have hearts!"

"We will someday..." Demyx whispered to the floor.

"Even so, he'll never want anything to do with you. Mark my words." Saix said, pompously. Demyx felt the wet sting of tears behind his glacier-blue eyes.

"One day..." he said, looking up at Saix with pure hatred "One day your malice will come full circle. And I'm going to be there to see it." he said, his voice laden with poison. Saix smiled wickedly.

"I look forward to that day...'DemDem'." he whispered. Without another glance, he disappeared the same way he entered.

The room was silent, save for the whisper of burning tobacco as Demyx took a long drag, and the spatter of a teardrop as it landed between his feet on the cold tile.

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End of chapter 1! Wahooo!

So yes, it started out slow, but I like my stories to have a bit of meat on their metaphorical bones. It'll pick up, I promise.

Review this and I'll love you forever and a day. Seriously. Your opinion is needed.

I've treated this story like my own dysfunctional, dearly loved child since I began writing it months ago on paper when my computer crashed. I'd like to know how I'm doing so far.

Chapter 2 will be posted when I can will my over-worked digits back into motion.


	2. Adaptation

Aaaaand we're back!

Chapter two! Yay!

A/N: For this chapter, we have "Nancy boy" by Placebo. Good stuff!

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or any of it's characters. I wish to god I did. There'd have been orgies...erm...I mean...oh screw it.

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"**Adaptation"**

The meeting and greeting of the newest members was boring, as anticipated by all. The girl was blond, thin and rude. Not that Demyx expected anything special. And the boy that was there... Roxas was his name? He looked more out of it than Vexen did most days. His weapon wasn't even that impressive. Even Demyx could have come up with something like a giant key...

Still... something about Roxas set off all kinds of alarms in Demyx's head. It wasn't the way he looked. Truth be owned, he looked about as dangerous as a 5 year old with a slingshot. And Demyx _did_ relish in the fact that he was shorter. No... it was something else about him. Something in his eyes, as blue and piercing as they were. That kid wasn't to be trusted. Not at all.

The rest of the day that had started too early, was dull. It surprised Demyx that such an 'elite' group could be so boring. Vexen and Zexion sat in the common area, talking in hushed voices about nothing in particular, Xemnas spent his afternoon holed up with Saix and Xaldin, pouring over what he liked to call 'battle plans'. And Axel had been absent from the castle since the early morning rendezvous. Demyx wanted to ask Luxord where he might have gone, but worried that it may be too obvious to the smarter Organization members that Demyx found Axel disturbingly attractive. It wasn't really all that hard to miss. He would follow Axel through the halls like a lost puppy, looking at him with misty-eyed admiration when he spoke, often losing his voice when Axel looked right at him. And of course, there was Saix, who knew every detail about Demyx's one-sided love affair right down to what he thought Axel would look like with his shirt off. It gave Demyx great pleasure to hear Saix shudder and gag from another room when Demyx thought about Axel and Saix decided to listen in. Although, it worried him terribly. How much longer would Saix keep it a secret? He wasn't that cruel. Was he? According to most of the Organization members, Saix was polite almost to the point of it being sickening. It seemed though that since Demyx joined, he'd become a real monster. It figured.

There was no sun in the World That Never Was, as it was so lovingly called by it's residents, but you could tell when it was evening. Demyx liked imagining sunsets. He often thought about what they'd look like from the Castle. They were beautiful in his head, a dance of pinks and purples swirling around to a backdrop of succulent orange and red hues more beautiful than the loveliest of melodies. He imagined the rays of the fading sun warming the tip of his nose and his ears. It killed him once the fantasy was played out and the imaginary sun slipped below the mountains in his mind. He hadn't left the Castle since he'd come here. Hadn't visited any world but his own. He was going crazy, being locked up all the time. Evenings made him the most uneasy. The Castle would go quiet and the footsteps would fade from the halls as members of the Organization retired to their rooms to read themselves to sleep or fall onto their beds as a pile of exhausted, still clothed dead weight. The only sound was what Demyx guessed were generators, and the occasional appearance of a Dusk. He found himself awaking with a start in the middle of the night when a misguided lesser Nobody would materialize at the foot of his bed. It was unnerving and Demyx would often lay in bed all night with the covers pulled up to his chin, his breath half-held in anticipation of the next disturbance from the corner of his dark room. But he was getting used to it.

That's what bothered him the most. Life as a Nobody was hard as it was, but being constantly reminded of your existence's meaninglessness every day when attempt after attempt to use Kingdom Hearts failed... well that was just downright depressing. Demyx shook these images from his head. There was not use dwelling on something you couldn't change. At least, that's what Axel said. Ah, Axel...

It was dark now, or at least it would be if there was a time during the day when it was light out. He should be back now, right? If he was, he would most likely be in bed. "_Why didn't he come to see me?_" Demyx wondered to himself, then shook his head. It's not like they were in a relationship, right? He sighed.

By the time Demyx was finished making a mental list of all the reasons he felt sorry for himself, it was late in the night. Much later than he was used to being awake, but he wasn't at all tired. Besides wallowing in self-pity, there was so much to think about, it overwhelmed him. He paced in the Hall of Empty Melodies, watching the view shift and change with his mood. Thoughts flashed back and forth in his mind like angry lightening. About Axel, himself, his other, his future, the past that was fading more and more with every passing moment. As he paced, he could feel himself stepping on cigarette butts. He was too wrapped up in thinking and too numb to even notice he was chain-smoking, let alone care about what would happen when The Superior found him littering inside the castle. He plunged his fingers inside the box to grab another, but found only loose bits of tobacco that quickly found their way under his prying fingernails. It was no matter, he kept pacing. Back and forth, back and forth until he wasn't pacing anymore. He was walking through the glorious marble and onyx halls, past doors and the occasional Dusk creeping about in the corner until he found himself standing in front of a particular door. One with an incandescent red crystal knob. Axel's door.

Demyx cursed the reality that all troubled roads lead to the root of the problem. He stood for a long while, just staring at the door, not even sure what he would do once he was inside. He balled his gloved hands into fists over and over, grinding his teeth, obscenities running through his head. Before he had a mental grip on his movements, his trembling hand was on the knob, turning it, pushing the door inward to reveal Axel peacefully asleep on the bed, his black satin covers pulled up to his chin. Demyx stepped into the room and let the door quietly click shut behind him. However quiet it might have been, it made Axel squint his closed eyes, mumble something and roll over, revealing a milky, smooth, softly chiseled chest. Demyx's eyes widened as he drew a sharp breath, biting his lower lip, nearly breaking the soft skin with his teeth. The hovering ball of red flame in the corner of the room was a conjuring of Axel's and also served as an enchanting, hypnotizing night light. It's subtle glow danced over Axel's bare chest and strong arms where they lay above his head. Every inch of skin on him looked softer than the sheets that surrounded the sleeping prince. Demyx wanted to touch it, even if only to test it's satin quality. He shook his head gently, careful not to disturb the ever obnoxious metal hanging from his neck.

"A-Axel?" Demyx asked in a dry, croaking voice. Axel's only movement was a twitch in his closed eyelids. Demyx took a deep breath and called Axel's name a bit louder. At this, he opened his eyes, the emerald beauties sparkling in the dim light. He sat up, the black blanket falling into his lap, revealing a smooth, toned stomach and the most incredible set of hip bones Demyx had ever laid his greedy eyes on. A delicate strip of hair surrounded Axel's bellybutton and traveled downward with Demyx's eyes, disappearing into the sheets pooled at his waist.

"Mmm?" grunted Axel, peering through the dim light. "Demyx?" He asked the cloaked figure at the foot of his bed, his voice thick with sleep. His voice jarred Demyx from a particularly nice fantasy and he looked from Axel's chest directly into his striking eyes.

"Y-yeah?" he whispered. Axel rubbed his eyes with the heel of his palm, wincing at the sting of sleep deprivation, and yawned. "What's up? Did something happen?" He looked around the windowless room, trying to get a grip on time. "It's not morning is it?" he asked, his eyes still only slits in the red glow of an otherwise dark room. Demyx stood rooted to the spot.

"It's not morning." he managed without stuttering or slurring. Axel stared at him questioningly. "I-I was just wondering where you were all day is all..." Demyx lied lamely, his voice trailing off, his eyes finding something other than the blissfully naked man in front of him to focus on. Most unfortunately for him, news had reached his ears that Axel does indeed sleep in the nude. Axel made a noise that sounded like a sigh/scoff hybrid.

"I was out working." he mumbled. Demyx was genuinely interested.

"Working?" He repeated.

"Yeah. I travel to different worlds, keeping the lesser Nobodies in check. It's actually a lot harder than it sounds." said Axel with disdain in his voice. Demyx couldn't help himself.

"You get to travel to other worlds?" he piped cheerily. It was incredibly difficult to resist launching himself onto Axel's bed, curling up with a pillow and crying 'Tell me all about it!'. Demyx was quite proud that he'd managed, though he began shaking slightly at the mention of a world other than this one.

"Yeah. It's not as fun as you'd think." Axel sighed. Demyx hung his head unintentionally.

"I've never been to any world but this one and my own. I don't even really remember my world." he said sadly. Axel's eyes went from droopy and tired to full and concerned.

"Really?" he asked. "Not even a side-trip on the way here?" he inquired. Demyx shook his head, his wispy bangs brushing his forehead.

"Not even a side-trip. One minute, I'm being grabbed too tightly on the arm by a big guy with blue hair, the next, I'm standing on Havoc's Divide and a robe's being shoved in my face. Like I was gonna argue that one..." Demyx said with a scoff. Axel chuckled darkly.

"You didn't want to come here?" He asked the sulking diminutive one.

"Hardly." mumbled Demyx. Axel shook his head in disgust.

"Well then... another similarity." he said to Demyx.

"You didn't want to join, either?" Demyx asked, his enthusiasm for Axel's stories renewed.

"Not a chance. I was grabbed, same as you. But by Xemnas himself. Said they wanted me for 'my skills'." he said.

"But... but you're so confident. And so driven. You act like you wouldn't rather be anywhere else in the cosmos than here, doing The Superior's bidding." said Demyx in awe. Axel shook his head, his glorious vermilion locks emphasized in the red glow.

"Of course. It's called 'adaptation'. Got it memorized?" Axel said, looking at Demyx who still could not move, then he looked at the floor. "So was that uh... all you needed?" he asked. The word "adaptation" was still running through Demyx's head, urging him to "adapt" and tell Axel why he really came into his room unannounced tonight.

"I uh... I wanted to tell you something." He finally said, after mustering every ounce of courage in his body.

"Shoot." Axel said, yawning again. Right as Demyx was about to confess, a voice in the back of his frazzled mind screamed "_Are you MAD?! You can't tell him! Shut your big mouth and let's get the hell outta here!_" and Demyx's voice caught in his throat, which he cleared and continued.

"I just wanted you to know that I think there's something really off about that Roxas kid." he lied again. Axel thought for a moment, fighting the haze of oncoming sleep.

"The new guy?" he asked, and Demyx nodded. "Eh... hadn't really noticed."

"Right then." nodded Demyx.

"So...that's all?" Asked Axel as if he could tell there was something else on Demyx's mind. Which he couldn't. Could he?

"Yeah, that's it." Demyx smiled falsely.

"Cool beans. I'll see you tomorrow, then." he mumbled, falling back on his pillow, crushing his spikes, which remained perfect despite abuse.

"Yep, bye!" chirped Demyx, turning on his heel and exiting the room. The door shut behind him and he crossed the hall to thump his forehead over and over on the cool, reflective marble muttering "stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid arrogant chicken shit..." to himself.

"Nice save." came Saix's voice from behind him.

"I'm going to end you, so help me..." Demyx muttered, not missing a beat.

"I don't know what's better: watching you fail miserably at telling him, or knowing that you'll suffer forever because you can't." mused Saix. Demyx ceased the assault and wheeled around to face Saix, fire in his eyes.

"Look, I don't know what crawled up your ass and died, but I want you to stop taking it out on me. I did nothing to you, alright? Nothing!" Demyx said through gritted teeth. Saix scoffed.

"Give me one good reason." he quipped.

"Because I'll destroy you." Demyx threatened.

"I'd like to see you try." laughed Saix. Demyx's eyes narrowed and he raised a gloved hand above his head, a sitar appearing in his open palm. Keeping his eyes locked on Saix, Demyx called forth a wall of water that erupted mere inches from Saix's face.

"Mock me again and I'll fucking drown you." Demyx murmured, his eyes still on his enemy. Saix looked at Demyx through the wall of water, watching the droplets distort his painfully young face that was contorted with anger and frustration that went far deeper than Saix's taunting.

"You don't have the balls t-..." as Saix spoke, the water wall came crashing down on top of him, soaking through his robe, filling his boots to the brim. Saix opened his eyes, drops of water falling from his lashes. He hadn't moved an inch, his hands still folded neatly behind his back. Demyx was still looking at him coldly. "Well that was childish." he muttered to the younger Nobody. Demyx considered taking his threat beyond a warning shot, but decided against it.

"You just don't get it, Saix. You just don't know." he sighed, defeated.

"Don't know what?" questioned the soaked man.

"What this is like. The kind of pain it leaves you in." Demyx said sadly. There was a pang in Saix's chest and it was clear in his eyes. There was something deeper. Something _much_ deeper than he let on.

"I understand more than you know, child." Saix whispered. Demyx shook his head 'no'.

"You can't even begin to imagine. Now get the fuck out of my way before I decide to stop being generous..." Demyx mumbled, brushing past Saix and walking down the now somewhat flooded hall to his room.

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And, SCENE!

Well that was interesting, wasn't it?

Not bad for someone who's had no sleep in the past two days!

Alrighty, so far, Saix has been a jerk and Demyx is acting way too butch for his creampuff stereotype, but that's all about to change, and rather drastically at that.

They're called 'reviews', by the way. They make me all kinds of warm and fuzzy inside and they would be very much appreciated.

It's just a blue button. It's not gonna eat you.


	3. Weakness

Hey there, folks!

It's time for chapter three! Hooray!

A/N: Background music for chapter three... "Stellar" by Incubus. Yummy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or any of it's characters. I just like to think I do.

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"**Weakness"**

The following days passed much as they always did. With Axel and Zexion out on Nobody patrol, the only other person in the Castle that paid much attention to Demyx was Luxord, who was comfortably snoring in a plush white chair in the common area. Demyx considered taking a nap as well when Vexen momentarily engaged him in a conversation about the chemical imbalance of something or another...Demyx never really did pay much attention to Vexen's ramblings. He couldn't think of a single Organization member that did, save for Zexion. The laziness of afternoon was at it's peak and the Castle seemed at total ease when footsteps in the adjacent hall sent shivers down Demyx's spine, the hair on his neck standing up. Saix.

"I wonder..." he said smoothly and in a low tone so not to disturb Vexen with his nose almost literally buried in a large book with a black cover. "If today will be your big day, DemDem. But then again...you'd have to be brave for that kind of thing." he mumbled dismissively, dragging his gloved fingers lightly over the back of the chair in which Demyx was seated. With a satisfied smile that Demyx could feel on the air, Saix exited the common area on the other side as quickly and silently as he entered, and Demyx fumed. If Saix kept this up, there'd be nothing left of him when the sitarist got done with him. Luxord shifted in his seat, sitting up and looking around in the dim light of the common area, licking a bit of drool from the corner of his mouth.

"What's he goin' on about?" he mumbled, scratching his head, ruffling the short blond hair. Demyx managed to tear his eyes away from the door frame on the other side of the room, and stared at Luxord.

"Nothing. Saix was just talking to me about nothing." he murmured. "Play you a round..." he offered, shuffling a deck of playing cards on the small end table next to his chair. Luxord practically leaped off his over-stuffed chair and into the seat opposite Demyx at the small white table.

"You know my weakness, kid." smiled Luxord, rubbing his hands together excitedly. A spark lit Demyx's icy blue eyes.

"Weakness..." he mused.

xXxXxXxXxX

"Hey! Zexion!" Demyx called, walking fast to keep up with the short cloaked figure as he walked along the florescent, transparent steps of Ruin and Creation's Passage. "We're on watch today."

"I know." the figure replied, sounding bored. Demyx and Zexion walked for a moment in silence, their footsteps and the low hum of a nearby generator were the only audible clashes with the eternal eerie quiet of the Castle.

"I have a question for you..." Demyx said casually.

"If you're going to ask me for munny, cigarettes or a shift change, the answer is no." Zexion said in the same bored voice. Demyx blinked and shook his head.

"I...wasn't going to ask for any of that...just information." he mumbled. Zexion nodded and took a few more steps.

"You have cigarettes? Since when do you smoke?" inquired Demyx. Zexion stopped in his tracks, but the small smile on his face was amused.

"I don't. But Vexen does. I have that new chick Larxene run to Hallow Bastion and get 'em for me. Then I pass them on to him." he explained. Demyx cocked an eyebrow and Zexion caught the look. "Ugh." he groaned. "It's not like that. Vexen is like my teacher. And kinda like a brother..." he huffed, looking away from Demyx. "Who do you want me to help you destroy, water boy?" he asked.

"Saix." Demyx said without hesitation and Zexion's eyes became wide.

"Forget it." he declared, walking away from Demyx.

"But why_ not_?" demanded Demyx, walking alongside him again.

"Exactly how hard _did_ you hit your head yesterday?" Zexion asked, referring to Demyx slipping in a puddle of water still left over in the hall from the confrontation the day before.

"Not that hard..." Demyx mumbled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head where the bump now protruded, his cheeks tinged pink with embarrassment over slipping on what was left over from an attack. Zexion let out a frustrated groan.

"Look, I know to a lot of people, Saix seems really calm and collected. But it's a mask... a facade. Under that polite exterior is wild, raging fucking beast ready to tear the head off of anyone who crosses him. He's a Berserker, doesn't that tell you anything?" Zexion cried, his words echoing in the endless cavern of shifting color that surrounded them.

"I'll make sure no one finds out you helped." Demyx offered. Zexion stared him down.

"Everyone finds out everything eventually. And nothing stays a secret for long when your overlord has freaky mind-reading powers!" he argued, pressing his long index finger to his temple, covered in light blue hair. Demyx looked down and away from his piercing eyes.

"Alright, well... I guess I'll see you on watch tonight." he mumbled, obviously defeated.

"I'm not going on watch. I have better things to do. I'm gonna switch with someone." Zexion snapped, irritated. Demyx nodded, still not looking at the other boy. He turned to leave when Zexion groaned quietly, heaved a sigh and called to him.

"When was the last time you were in Hallow Bastion?" came his voice through the stale air. Demyx shook his head.

"Never." he called back.

"It used to be called 'The Radiant Garden'. It's been restored quite nicely over the years... almost to the splendor it once was. Any world with a name like that's gotta be worth a look. If you decide to do any traveling, make it your first stop." Zexion said before turning around to continue his pilgrimage back to the common area. "It's really beautiful in the morning, by the way. Right before the sun rises, if you stand in the Bailey and look out... you'll be pretty amazed at what you see." he called over his shoulder, walking the rest of the way down the glimmering path and out the door to the skyway.

xXxXxXxXx

It was colder than any night Demyx remembered. Not the usual cold, either. The kind of ominous, creeping cold that fills your stomach right before something very bad happens and you can sense it. Demyx shrugged it off, pulling his close-fitting robe even tighter around his trembling frame. "_Were the hell is Zexion's replacement?_" he wondered to himself. "_If he ditched me for the night without telling anyone to switch with him, I'll shove my sitar so far up his cute little ass he won't be able to walk right for an eternity and a half!_" he thought darkly. He pulled his knees up to his chest, letting his eyes droop and his mind wander. It hadn't gone very far when the thoughts in his head about the warm bed he was missing out on was shattered by a familiar voice, sweet as the dawn.

"Who's the bright spark that stuck us all the way the hell out here?" grumbled Axel, taking a seat next to a trembling Demyx and dangling his legs over the edge. They looked so strange, all in black, stark against the luminescent blue of the Brink of Despair. Demyx chuckled darkly.

"I'll give you three guesses..." he mumbled into his knees. Axel scoffed.

"That blue-haired son of a bitch is really starting to get on my _last_ nerve..." he said through gritted teeth. Demyx nodded slowly, staring into the endless blue beneath him.

"What's he done to you lately?" he asked Axel casually.

"Nothing too drastic. Just his usual douchebaggery. But something seems different. He's been meaner than usual." Axel mused, looking to Demyx. "Whaddya think's gotten into him?" he asked. Demyx shrugged, not saying a word.

"And just what has gotten into you?" asked Axel, placing a hand on Demyx's trembling shoulder. He sighed.

"I've been thinking..." Demyx began when the vermilion-haired man cut him off with a smile.

"Well there's your problem right there. Thinking is never a good thing." he nodded.

"Ignorance isn't always bliss, Axel." sighed Demyx, not taking his eyes off his knees.

"It's worked out just fine for me." offered the redhead. Demyx didn't speak and Axel's face fell. "Alright, no more playing around. You're worrying me. Tell me what's up." he said. A zing of happiness ran down the length of Demyx's back at the thought of Axel being concerned for him. He thought briefly if it was really sick to be pleased at someone else's dismay, pity and worry for him.

"What are we doing here, Axel?" he finally asked in a half-whisper.

"Guarding the border?" Axel volunteered.

"But why? To what point and purpose? If we're nothing, how can anything we do mean _anything_?" squeaked Demyx miserably, pulling his knees closer. Axel sighed sadly.

"DemDem, we've been over this. Adaptation is key. Just ignore what you are and focus on what you want to become." he soothed, but Demyx shook his head.

"I'm not as strong as you are, Axel. I try to be, but I'm not. I'm a...a... a friggin' creampuff!" he wailed, burying his head in his arms.

"I think you're very strong, Demyx. You just don't see that strength yet." Axel whispered, his voice quite changed. Demyx finally locked his cerulean orbs on Axel, and he looked so aged. He wasn't more than three years older than Demyx but his time with the Organization had clearly taken it's toll on whatever youthful happiness he once possessed. It was now, finally, at the edge of literal eternity that Demyx saw in Axel the same humanistic frailty that haunted his waking moments and his deepest dreams. He saw past the sarcastic facade and into the very soul of his friend. And saw him as just that. A friend, a companion, an comrade. Staring forever in the face, defying the ways of the world with their existence, so human despite having lost anything that made them remotely human. Demyx swallowed the lump in his throat dryly.

"I don't believe you." he choked. "I don't believe I'm strong." he whispered, meeting Axel's sad eyes.

"And why not?" Axel asked, his tone even. Demyx tore his eyes away.

"Too much..." he spoke. "Too much has happened and too much hasn't." Axel was silent, though trembling. "I have nothing to believe in anymore." Demyx whispered through quivering lips as a tear rolled down his cheek, tinged rosy with emotion. He closed his eyes tightly, trying to keep his sobs under control. Through the haze of confusion and misery that had settled on his mind, he heard Axel speak.

"If nothing else..." he began in a whisper. "Believe in me." Demyx looked up in time to see Axel wrap his arms around him gently, pulling him close against his warm, hard body. The side of Demyx's face was pressed firmly to Axel's strong chest and he could smell him, hear him breathe, feel his fingers in his own golden hair. He realized that he'd stopped crying. Axel pressed his face to the top of Demyx's head and whispered, his breath tickling Demyx's fine hair.

"Please don't cry, Demyx. I can't bear to watch it." Axel murmured. Demyx nodded, his cheek brushing the fabric of Axel's robe.

"I'm just so scared." Demyx hiccuped.

"Don't be. I'll always be here for you, I promise. I'll be your sanctuary, and your friend...until you're ready to take it all on alone. You have nothing to fear. You have my word. Don't be afraid." Axel whispered, running his fingers along Demyx's back soothingly.

Demyx shut his eyes and breathed slowly, Axel's scent filling his nose. Axel began to hum a gentle, sad melody that was no more than a bassy rumble in his soft, welcoming chest. A tear slid down Demyx's face, drying cold on his neck. He slowed his breathing, relaxing in Axel's arms that cradled him. Before long, Axel was rocking him gently and Demyx was asleep. His first peaceful sleep in recallable memory. The cold wind and biting, frigid, lung-stinging air did nothing to ruin this moment of warmth and bliss. Demyx felt safe, happy...for the first time in so long, he felt right.

But from afar, someone watched the two, hatred seething in his veins. Someone who saw the platonic gesture and was filled with insane jealousy. Someone who vowed to destroy Axel and Demyx both.

"Saix?" came Zexion's cool voice. Saix twitched.

"I'm busy." he snapped.

"It's urgent." insisted Zexion. Saix turned from the window to face him.

"What is it?!" he demanded coldly.

"The Superior requests your presence." Zexion spoke smoothly.

"What does he want?" snapped Saix.

"I haven't a clue. No one tells me anything, you know that." griped Zexion. A malevolent fire erupted behind Saix's eyes.

"That must bother you. Always being the messenger, never the one important enough to receive the message..." Saix prodded. Zexion chuckled softly.

"You're a real piece of work, moon boy. I know what you're trying to do and I'm rather insulted that you actually thought I'd fall for it. Besides, I already report to a higher up, Saix." he spat the last word. Saix scoffed.

"Who?" he asked.

"Xemnas." stated Zexion, a small triumphant smile on his lips. Saix roared with laughter, making Zexion's smile droop.

"You're a terrible liar." Saix grinned. Zexion only raised an eyebrow.

"About some things. But I'm completely serious." he said, his tone unfaltering.

"I doubt it." Saix scoffed again. Zexion smiled wickedly.

"And I doubt the Superior would take the news of your love affair with that Aerith girl too well." he glared. Saix's eyes widened and every muscle in his body clenched.

"_You. Wouldn't. Dare._" Saix growled. Zexion only smiled.

"Wouldn't I?" The room was still as Saix and Zexion stared at each other with malice, electricity filling the air between them. Zexion made the first move, calling forth a pillar of darkness, but Saix reacted too quickly, launching himself at the suddenly very frail boy, catching him by the collar of his robe and slamming him hard against the wall behind him.

"You little son of a bitch!" he growled in Zexion's ear.

"Eat me." Zexion laughed back. Saix growled and slammed Zexion against the wall again, sending his head ricocheting off the marble. Pain shot through Zexion's head, splitting it in two.

"If you say a word..." warned Saix.

"You'll what? Cry?" Zexion chuckled through the pain. Saix's eyes flared and he grabbed Zexion by the throat, slamming him over and over into the wall, wracking his head with pain, bruising his back and shoulders, straining his neck with whiplash to the point of snapping. Zexion's eyes blurred and swiveled in his head. Saix slammed him against the wall, the hardest yet, holding him by the neck against the gleaming white, Zexion's feet and the hem of his robe dangling above the ground. Saix dug his fingers into the boy's soft neck with crushing force. Zexion tore at Saix's hands, tears streaming down his face despite himself, fear resonating in his eyes.

"W-what're you doing?!" he choked. "Let me down!" cried Zexion, but Saix's eyes had glazed over. Zexion's eyes widened and he began to cry out in fear and pain, kicking the wall with his boots, screaming as loud as he could but it came out only as a strained gargle. He became light-headed and his vision went black. His movements became less and less forceful and he stopped kicking, stopped clawing at Saix's hands. Soon he was limp in the older man's grip, but Saix would not ease up.

"Let him go!" Came a voice from the door way. There stood Luxord who, having heard Zexion's cries, had come running. His voice jarred Saix's mind and he instantly released Zexion who fell to the floor in a heap. Luxord quickly gathered him up in his arms like a broken toy, pushing the hair from his face, shaking him gently and mumbling his name. As air and life returned to him, Zexion gripped Luxord's robe feebly and wept, burying his face in the man's chest.

"I-I was...was..." Saix began, still a bit dazed. Luxord shot him a look that could kill and carried Zexion out of the room leaving Saix to regain composure in a lonely room drenched in a depressing, moonlit glow.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Wow. That Saix is a crazy bitch, aint he?  
But you'll see why!

I'm planning to upload a chapter a day or every other day.

If I can do that, you can leave me a review.

It's the blue button at the bottom of your screen above the obnoxious ad. It won't hurt you.

Don't make me beg.


	4. No point in dwelling

Hola, amigos!

Let's get right on into chapter four!

I have to say though, from now on I'm going to be uploading a bit less frequently. I've had everything written down in my trusty, beat-to-hell notebook up to this point, but now I have to write everything as I go. You all know what that's like. Also, my internet has been temporarily revoked by those greedy, thieving whores at Quest, but it'll be back by the end of this month. Hopefully. They made me choose between having internet and having food and while the net is great and all, I love my ramen. You can't really blame me.

MOVING ON!!

A/N: Inspiration and musical motivation for chapter 4, brought to you by "Choice hops and bottled self-esteem."- Bayside

Disclaimer: I whole-heartedly wish that I owned Kingdom Hearts and was making money from this, but as my delinquent cable bill shows, I'm a broke ass with no rights to the games or the characters or any of the money the previously stated earns Disney and Square Enix. Damn them.

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"**No point in dwelling"**

It didn't take long for everyone in the Castle to learn of what happened to Zexion at the hands of a catatonic Saix. Luxord wouldn't stop fuming about how he was going to "wring his pompous neck" and Zexion refused to come out of his room, even at Vexen's coaxing. When Vexen left the boys room, his eyes were wide with shock and he held up three fingers, indicating the width of the bruises on Zexion's diminutive neck. Luxord's face flushed with rage and he spun around on the heel of his black boots, violently punching the wall behind him, sending spiderweb cracks sprawling from his throbbing fist, nearly shattering the whole tile. Xaldin, who'd been leaning against said wall leisurely, glanced to his right at the fist mere inches from his face without flinching in the slightest. He cast an exasperated look at Luxord and folded his arms across his huge chest.

"Self control..." he muttered, his voice soft. Larxene and Marluxia watched the drama from a ways down the hall, shaking their heads.

"What the hell happened to the kid?" Larxene asked of Xigbar, who'd come to stand by them.

"Saix had the mother of all wack attacks and started strangling him." he shrugged. The three watched as Luxord knelt in the hall, pressing his forehead against the cool wall, trembling, fighting rage and tears.

"Just what's gotten into him? If I remember correctly, he was the one that kicked Zexion down a flight of stairs a few weeks ago for something or another..." Marluxia remarked. Xigbar chuckled, despite the tension in the air around them.

"One, that was an accident. Zexion tripped." he began, watching Laxaeus try without success to comfort a quietly sobbing Luxord. "Two... he has a connection to the kid." he muttered.

"Connection?" questioned Larxene. Xigbar's good eye flickered to her stern but beautiful face for a moment, then back at the scene unfolding.

"The kid... Zexion...his other was Luxord's other's son." Xigbar said. Marluxia frowned.

"You mean they're related?" He asked.

"Yeah. I guess you could say that. But really they aren't anymore. They're Nobodies. It doesn't matter who we used to be. There's no point in dwelling." Xigbar said dismissively. Larxene put her hands on her delicate hips and glared up at Xigbar.

"In the time I've known him, I've never seen Luxord behave like that. Ever." Larxene glared harder, but Xigbar refused to look at her.

"What are you not telling us?" asked Marluxia.

"I'm telling you what I know." Xigbar said quickly. Larxene's pretty face curled into a scowl, her tiny hands into fists and she punched Xigbar's arm with decent force.

"Ow..." he muttered, grabbing his arm. "You have issues, lady." he said to Larxene.

"I hate it when people point out the obvious so why don't you pull your head out of The Superior's ass and tell us what you know before I set my aim lower, you overgrown ape!" she glared, motioning with a finger to Xigbar's groin. His eyes grew wide and he looked to Marluxia for support. Marluxia only looked back at him with eyes that said he was going to let Larxene do whatever she pleased.

"Alright, alright..." he breathed. "Xemnas has been keeping an eye on Luxord and Zexion for a while. He knew how they were connected right from the beginning and he wanted to see how they would interact with each other. Like they were both some sick experiment of his..." Xigbar mumbled, knowing the hell he'd catch for breathing a word of anything Xemnas did behind closed doors.

"And?" Marluxia urged.

"And he began noticing that even before they knew who the other was, they were acting like father and son. Luxord would sit with Zexion for hours and listen to him ramble, smiling like he was interested, like all good parents do. And Zexion would fall asleep in his lap in the common area while Luxord read late at night. Anyone who was in the room with them could practically feel the attachment." Xigbar told the two. Marluxia interrupted him.

"That's impossible. We can't have...attachments to each other. We don't feel. We're..." he searched for the word. "Nothing. How can nothing feel?" he asked Xigbar. The man to his left looked at him out of his good eye. That shining golden eye spoke of the most taboo of rumors they all knew deep in their non-existent hearts to be true.

"We can feel..." said Larxene, looking at the floor, her arms crossed. "Because that whole spiel about us not having hearts is bullshit." she said coldly. "Isn't it, Xigbar?" she spoke, looking right up at him.

"That depends on who you ask." he whispered. Marluxia's eyes widened and he let out a low whistle.

At that moment, a pillar of shadow erupted a few feet behind them and all three jumped at the sound. Out of the darkness stepped The Superior. Three sets of eyes full of malice fell upon him and he only smiled.

"Where is Saix?" he asked. Larxene and Marluxia continued to glare, but Xigbar spoke.

"No one's seen him since the incident, sir." Xigbar nearly stuttered. There was a nod from Xemnas and nothing more. Another column of darkness and he was gone.

"Prick." muttered Larxene.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The cold wasn't letting up at all. And now the wind had started back up again. By now, Axel would have stormed back to the Castle demanding to know why he was sent to the middle of fucking nowhere on the coldest night he'd ever seen...were it not for Demyx curled up and asleep in his arms. He looked so peaceful... so unreal. The blue glow that surrounded them lit up the delicate features of his young face. His soft lips were smiling, even in his sleep, and his eyelids fluttered, the crescents of butterfly lace eyelashes brushing his cheeks softly. And he was so warm. Axel smiled, his lips slightly chapped.

The night was deepening as Axel watched Demyx sleep, smiling when he moved or murmured in his dreams. Axel knew they'd have to get back soon. And if anyone saw them like this...but...what _was_ this? Axel was just a friend. Holding another friend because he was afraid. That's what friends do, right? Right? Axel shook his head, a few strands of fiery hair falling in his face. What the hell was he doing? Did he actually feel something for Demyx? Of course not. It's not possible. Nobodies don't feel. The Superior had said so. Axel's thoughts raced like lightening behind his sparkling emerald eyes. He'd gotten himself into some pretty iffy situations before, but this one definitely took the cake. He thought of how he'd rather be bludgeoned to death with a rusty pipe than look at Demyx's sweet face again. It was too deliciously painful. Every time he saw the delicately sloping eyes, button nose and sweet mouth, he felt as if he'd been stabbed in the chest with his own chakram. But at the same time, he felt a warmth spread from the spot, engulfing his mind and making a grin tug at the corners of his mouth. It felt much like the warmth that radiated from Demyx's body, seeping through the layers of clothing on both of them and dancing across Axel's skin. He shuddered. Demyx shifted in his arms, grabbing onto his cloak gently with tired fingers. He buried his face deeper in Axel's chest, breathing him in. Axel smiled and brushed the hair from Demyx's face. Demyx muttered something into Axel's robe and smiled warmly. Axel leaned in a bit closer to listen. And what he heard turned his blood to ice and his pupils to pinpricks.

"I love you, Axel..." Demyx muttered in his sleep, nuzzling Axel's chest softly. Axel's breath caught in his chest and he shook uncontrollably. This couldn't be happening...it shouldn't be happening. It can't... it _can't_. "Please say you love me, too." Demyx whispered gently. Axel gazed at Demyx, then out at the endless blue around him. He wanted to say yes, honestly, he did. But everything he'd been taught since he joined the Organization was telling him that it was impossible for Demyx to feel what he did, and for Axel to feel the same. But Axel knew it in his heart that he felt it. Every time he saw the sweet sitarist, every time he heard his voice or touched him, he knew... the Organization was wrong. From the moment Axel met Demyx in the hall that day, all nerves and wispy blond hair, from the moment he looked into the boy's eyes and saw an innocent, undeniable truth within them and from the moment he'd made the decision that there was definitely something about Demyx that made him feel alive...they'd been wrong. He sighed deeply and with a tear in his eye, pressed his face to Demyx's soft hair.

"I do..." he mumbled. At this, Demyx shifted in Axel's arms and opened his eyes. Axel sat up quickly and released him. Demyx stood, leaning back to pop several vertebrae into place. Axel stared at him, in shock.

"'I do' what?" Asked Demyx. Axel stared blankly.

"W-what?" he whispered.

"You said 'I do'. You do what?" Demyx asked with innocence in his icy blue eyes. Axel shook his head, fighting the urge to turn his head and heave the contents of his stomach into oblivion.

"N-nothing." he muttered, wiping the tear from his face. Axel stood, now feeling the cold in all it's vicious glory. He stared awkwardly at Demyx while he fixed his hair and robe. After a few moments of this, Axel opened his mouth to suggest returning to the Castle when a column of shadow appeared between the two of them. Out of it stumbled Saix, visibly shaken with his hair disheveled and fear in his eyes.

"You..." Demyx spat, narrowing his eyes. He was ready to beat him into a coma for sticking him out here on a night like this. Saix threw his hands up in surrender.

"Please! Please wait... please..." he stammered. "I need your help." he said, almost in tears. Axel stared in awe at the blue-haired man. "You...y-you...you have to help me." he trembled. Demyx glared at him and Axel continued to stare.

"Why the hell should we help you? You're an ass." Demyx snapped. Saix whirled around and grabbed Demyx's robe desperately.

"They're going to _kill_ me!" he cried. Demyx's eyes widened and he looked to Axel.

"Help." he squeaked. Axel shook himself out of shock and grabbed Saix's shoulder, pulling him off of Demyx.

"What do you mean they're going to kill you?" he demanded. Saix looked to Axel with fear written across his face.

"Zexion..." he trembled. "I tried to kill Zexion." he began to cry.

"_What?!_" Axel and Demyx cried in unison. Saix fell to his knees and sobbed.

"He..he threatened to tell Xemnas." was all Saix managed.

"Tell Xemnas what? What could possibly warrant you trying to kill the kid?" Axel cried.

"He was going to tell him about Aerith! That little fucker was going to spill it completely and I'd never be able to see her again!" Saix sobbed miserably.

"Who's Aerith?" asked Demyx.

"The woman I love..." Saix mumbled into the ground. The word 'love' resonated in the back of Axel's head and he looked to Demyx who was speaking again to the lump of cloak and man on the ground.

"Where does she live?" he asked soothingly, despite all Saix had done.

"In Hollow Bastion." replied Saix. Demyx tilted his head. _"So that's what Zexion was talking about..."_ he thought. Demyx looked up at Axel with remorse in his eyes.

"We've got to help him." he said. Axel was still trying to shake Demyx's earlier words from his head.

"What do you propose we do?" he asked feebly. A small smile spread across Demyx's face.

"Well...I've always wanted to see another world."

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Heh heh...watch out for that 'L' word...it's a doozy!

So here we stand with the sleep-talking Demyx, the shell-shocked Axel and an evil dictator that's taken a hell of a tumble from grace.

It gets SO much better from here!

Let's get some reviews goin', people!

I LIVE for your feedback.

Honest!


	5. Residual Emotion

OH MAH GIZZLES!!

Thaaaat's right!

We're onto chapter five!!

(Is it just me, or does this stuff come really easy when it's an awesome story?)

A/N: "Lazy Eye" By Silversun Pickups is the greatest song EVAR... and also the song on repeat while I was typing this. (my taste in music blows, yes?)

Disclaimer: This is purely fan-made. If the masterminds behind Kingdom Hearts could see what I've done to their creation, they'd die a thousand deaths. I'm sure of it.

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"**Residual Emotion"**

Things were beginning to die down in the Castle, though no one had heard from Axel, Demyx or Saix since the night before.

"What if Saix hauled off and killed them?" said Larxene.

"He's crazy, but he's not that bad. I think." remarked Zexion who'd finally come out of his room. He was back to his snippy, sarcastic self, but still remained curled up between Vexen and Luxord on the couch in the common room. Laxaeus and Marluxia had been sent to find them, while Xigbar had been called to The Superior's quarters.

His palms were sweating in his gloves as he walked down the hall to what he was sure was his death. Surely The Superior didn't know about the conversation the other day. Did he? Xigbar opened the door to Xemnas's room slowly. The place was truly glorious. It had blinding white walls, bathed in a blue-green glow from the giant enchanted flame that hovered near the high ceiling. A gift from Axel. Book shelves lined the wall on the left and weapons of various shapes, sizes and uses lined the other. A few books lay open on the floor near the large window which had a plush white chair set right in front of it. Papers were scattered over the surface of the large desk that sat dead center in the room. There was no bed, seeing as Xemnas had no need to sleep. He was 'evolved' as he'd put it. Though everyone seemed to agree that a nice nap (needed or not) would do him some good. In the far left corner near the unused fireplace was a cluster of chairs and foot stools that saw much use with meeting after meeting being held in this cavernous room. Xigbar spent most of his time in here these days, but the place never ceased to amaze him. Seated in one of the chairs in the cluster was Xemnas. Maybe it was the lighting, but he looked particularly dangerous today.

"Shut the door please." he said to Xigbar politely, and he complied, letting the huge door close behind him with an echoing thud, rather than a soft click. "And do have a seat." Xemnas smiled wide, motioning with a sweep of his arm to the seat opposite his. Xigbar crossed the room, his footsteps echoing as they always did, and sat uneasily in the chair.

"You uh...you wanted to see me?" he whispered. Xemnas's gaze never left the man sitting across from him, but he smiled.

"You act like I called you here to kill you, Xigbar." he chuckled darkly, most satisfied that he had so much power and influence over such a formidable man. Xigbar smiled weakly, trying to keep the sweat on his forehead to a minimum. "Such is not the case, I assure you." Xemnas said, finally breaking eye contact. Xigbar swallowed dryly. Just because he hadn't been called there for elimination in no way meant he was out of the woods. "Though death is the reason for our little meeting." he continued. Xigbar wondered if his face was now comparable to the high back of the white chair he was sitting in. "You've heard of course that Saix decided to act rashly and nearly killed a very important member." Xemnas looked to Xigbar, who nodded and perhaps a bit too fast. "Well as you might imagine, I don't take kindly to that kind of behavior. The occasional friendly tussle between members is acceptable and even encouraged, if it keeps you all quiet, but as you know dear Xigbar, Zexion is exponentially valuable to me. As is his father." Xemnas paused and awaited a response.

"Y-yeah uh...I know." Xigbar mumbled.

"I need to keep him alive. Saix however, has proved to be nothing more than a useless, sulking twit." Xemnas said, his voice so clear and perfect it nearly hurt to listen to.

"S-so... so you want me to kill him?" Xigbar questioned, his voice trembling with the rest of his body. Xemnas frowned over the rim of the glass he was sipping from.

"Of course not. Whatever gave you that idea? Besides... Axel is the only one I trust with elimination. He's a rare breed, compulsive, an adrenaline junkie. If there was ever a Nobody who could kill one of his own kind without remorse, it would be him." said Xemnas. Xigbar relaxed in his seat, nodding.

"So if you don't want him dead...?" questioned Xigbar. An all too pleased smile spread across The Superior's face.

"There's a woman. One who's caught Saix's eye and held it quite adamantly." he said smoothly. Whatever color was left in Xigbar's face drained.

"Zexion told you then? About Aerith?" he asked. Xemnas's eyebrows raised.

"No. It wasn't Zexion, though I'm displeased that two of my dearest members knew of this and said nothing." his eyes narrowed.

"Well... w-well we didn't think you'd mind." Xigbar lied, looking at the floor.

"Of course I mind. It's a woman." Xemnas said sternly.

"Larxene's a woman." Xigbar pointed out.

"Larxene is also a Nobody, Xigbar. You know how potentially dangerous outside contact can be. Especially when there's emotions involved." Xemnas remarked, looking out the window to his right.

"But... I thought we don't have emotion." Xigbar stated, remembering the conversation he'd had with Larxene and Marluxia. A strange flicker lit Xemnas's eyes.

"We don't, of course. But some may have residual emotions. Feelings brought on by memory and memory alone. Whatever the case may be, it's not good for the Organization and the Organization is my priority. You know that." he said, sipping from his glass again.

"So... what do you want me to do about it?" Xigbar asked. Xemnas smiled and set down his glass, moving to stand directly in front of Xigbar.

"Isn't it obvious?" asked Xemnas sweetly. "I want her dead, Xigbar. And you're just the man for the job." he smiled. Xigbar looked up at his overlord with horror.

"I can't do that! Just...just kill an innocent person!" he gasped and Xemnas clucked his tongue.

"Don't let those false feelings govern you, my friend. It's what needs to be done. If it does not get done, I'll consider it you turning your back on all of us. And you know what happens to those who desert the Organization." his eyes were brooding with malice. Xigbar felt a lead weight drop into his stomach. "She resides in Hollow Bastion. I have a feeling that may also be where Saix is headed. If you should encounter him there, inform me immediately." Xemnas asked smoothly.

"I...can't." Xigbar cried.

"Do you value your life?" Xemnas asked coldly. Xigbar stared with fear at Xemnas and knew he wasn't kidding.

"Alright..." he whispered hoarsely. "I'll do it."

"I knew I could count on you, Xigbar." Xemnas smiled. Without another word to The Superior, Xigbar left the luxurious room in shock. There was a moment of silence after the door shut when a portal of darkness appeared beside Xemnas. From it stepped Roxas, beaming...

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Zexion?" muttered Luxord to the boy asleep at his side. Zexion stirred a bit and looked up at Luxord with a smile.

"Yeah?" he muttered.

"I think you should go get some sleep." Luxord whispered. Zexion giggled childishly.

"But I _am_ asleep. Or... I was." he pointed out. Luxord smiled softly and kissed the top of Zexion's head, ruffling his hair.

"Yes, but I think you should be in your bed." he argued. Zexion looked up at the man with watery eyes.

"Carry me?" he asked sweetly. Luxord stood from the couch and delicately lifted the boy into his arms, cradling him close. He walked down the hall to Zexion's room with gentle steps, careful not to disturb him. He reached the door and opened it, pushing the door inward, setting the boy down on the cool marble. Zexion removed his robe and his boots with the help of Luxord. He removed his black pants, opting for a much more comfortable, loose pair of violet sleeping pants. He pulled his shirt off over his head and crawled into bed. Luxord noted as he pulled the covers over Zexion that the kid needed to eat more or something. He sat on the edge of Zexion's bed and watched the small boy snuggle down into his pillow and look up at him.

"Thank you." said Zexion.

"For what?" asked Luxord.

"Being there for me. Like... like a father." Zexion whispered. Luxord felt tears sting the back of his eyes and he leaned down to kiss Zexion's forehead.

"You're most welcome." he smiled. Luxord patted Zexion's sheets and stood, walking to the door.

"Good night, dad." Zexion murmured from his bed. Luxord stopped in his tracks, hand on the doorknob. The tears poured freely from his shining eyes.

"Good night, son." he whispered, exiting the room. He could practically feel Zexion's smile as the door shut behind him. It was the first time he'd ever called Luxord that. It was the happiest Luxord had felt since he'd become a Nobody. It was almost as if someone had given him back a part of himself.

Zexion lay peacefully on his bed and thought about Luxord. Memories flickered behind his eyes...only pieces of a whole picture. He remembered Luxord's Other. A man who looked exactly like him save for longer hair and shining pale green eyes. A tingling warmth spread from Zexion's chest and he smiled into his pillow. "Love". That's what he was feeling. The beautiful, secure love of a parent. It was truly something amazing.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Awwwww...

I know, I know...you wanna get back to Axel and Demyx.

Chillax, I got ya covered...in the next chapter.

Yesss... we must have the reviews, precious, we must! twitchspazdie


	6. Madness

Welcome back!

It's time for chapter six already!

God this never gets old, does it?!

And you can thank my sister for the rapid completion of these chapters. She sat next to me and beat me until I finished them.

A/N: Inspiration for this chapter compliments of "Blind" by KoRn. It's really a great song, by the way.

Disclaimer: If Kingdom Hearts was mine I'd have made it into a movie by now. But it's not. So we're all stuck waiting forever and a day until the third game comes out to get our fix.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"**Madness"**

"Oh wow!" exclaimed Demyx as he walked along a wall near the market in Hollow Bastion. "This place is so cool!" he stuck his arms out to the side and began to run along the wall on his tip toes. It wasn't a very high wall, so when Axel saw him start to lean to the left and eventually fall, he only chuckled lightly and shook his head. Demyx looked up at him from his spot on the cobblestone and smiled wide. He looked so different without that heavy robe hanging from him, Axel noted. He was wearing a tight blue shirt and black jeans with a tiny sitar-shaped charm hanging on a chain around his neck. Axel had opted for a shirt much like Demyx's, but in black with a red and black button-up shirt depicting flames along the hem hanging open over it, and of course, he wouldn't be caught dead in anything but his tight black jeans. Saix looked like a tired hobo in loose, faded jeans and a dirty white t-shirt, but anything was better than the very conspicuous black robe from hell.

"What're we gonna do now?" mumbled Saix, depressed. Axel rolled his eyes and looked over his shoulder at his former tormentor as he sulked in his shadow.

"We're going to find Aerith, tell her what's going on, and figure something out from there." Axel told him.

"You don't think Xemnas will order my elimination?" Saix trembled.

"Not a chance. It's not like you killed the little bastard. You just did what everyone else really, really wanted to do. Besides, if he was, I'd have heard about it by now." Axel said grimly, watching Demyx struggle to light a cigarette where he sat on the wall. The wind blew from behind him, sending those loose strands of hair dancing around his face. He was so beautiful. And something about being in another world brought out the loving, childish side of him that Axel adored. He'd never seen Demyx look happier. He looked back at Saix as the two walked at a leisurely pace, not bothering to keep up with Demyx who seemed to be positively made of energy. "You worry way too much, man."

"Axel! Saix! They sell ice cream here!" shouted Demyx excitedly. Axel smiled warmly and jogged a bit to stand beside Demyx at a small stand near the middle of the crowded market place. The woman behind the counter irritably waved away the smoke from Demyx's cigarette, though the happy sitarist didn't seem to notice. Saix walked over and stood behind the two, smiling weakly at the tall woman.

"Oh! Hello, Saix! Nice to see you again." she said in a friendly voice. Saix nodded.

"Nice to see you too, Marnela." he sighed. Marnela could sense his bad mood, but kept up her cheer.

"Are these friends of yours?" she asked politely motioning to the flamboyant young pair of Nobodies.

"What? Em...yes. These are my friends Axel and Demyx." he said hastily. They both smiled and waved awkwardly at the woman, though she had her eyes locked on Axel. He noticed that she wasn't looking away and took a small step backward.

"Oh!" exclaimed the woman. "I should know better than to stare. It's just that... you look so familiar." she mused aloud. Axel considered whether or not she would have seen him skulking around Hollow Bastion in pursuit of renegade Dusks, but remembered that he always kept his hood up.

"I...do?" he asked tentatively, and Marnela nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes. You look like a boy I knew when I was very young. He lived in the house next to mine, over in the borough..." she said, pointing to a cluster of rooftops in the distance. "He was my best friend growing up. He liked to burn things." she added as an afterthought.

"Burn things? Heh...imagine that." said Axel nervously.

"Yes but... after the heartless invasion, I never heard from him again. I was told that his family lives in a place called Twilight Town now, but no one ever mentions him." Marnela said sadly.

"What was his name?" inquired Demyx.

"I...don't remember." she admitted. "I know you're not him, though..." she said dismissively to Axel.

"And why is that?" he asked. She smiled up at him.

"His eyes were blue." she whispered nostalgically. Axel felt his stomach twist and drop. That smile...he knew that smile. He knew that voice, those gestures, that nose that was adorably too small for the face of the owner. The memories danced just out of reach of his consciousness. He breathed deep, wishing people would stop fucking with his head. Especially Demyx, though he didn't mean to. He kept brushing against him on accident, and catching his smiles, though he wasn't able to look into his eyes. Axel wanted a bottle of sake so bad he could almost feel it burning a path down his throat. Saix broke the uneasy silence.

"We're looking for Aerith. Have you seen her?" he asked. Marnela shook her head.

"No, I haven't. Perhaps she's running late this morning. You know how Aerith can be." She smiled, though Saix felt a lead weight drop into his stomach. "You could try checking her house." offered Marnela. And with that, the trio of Nobodies made their way into the borough, Axel's treat of three ice creams in hand.

Axel kept his head down as they walked, the wind gently blowing his red spikes and Demyx was happily bouncing along the cobblestone walkways, playing air-sitar and waving at children playing near a large, dilapidated fountain and Saix stared straight ahead, trying to keep his nerves under control. Aerith's house wasn't much further, he could see it in the distance where it lay wedged between two much larger houses, bushes growing and flowering out front. He held his breath and walked a bit faster, Axel and Demyx followed.

They crept slowly up the small set of stone steps, Demyx marveling at the brightly colored flowers growing in pots by the front door, Axel and Saix on their guard. Saix opened the door tentatively, peering inside. There was a dim light in the place, cast by the small, dusty windows and the faint smell of cedar and a well-cooked breakfast. The glass picture frames on the walls gleamed and the grandfather clock near the front door ticked quietly, but there was no other sound.

"Aerith?" Saix called into the stillness. There was no reply. Saix pushed the door the rest of the way open and stepped inside, Axel and Demyx following. "Aerith!" he called again in vain. He walked into the kitchen to find a plate of uneaten food and a full glass of sparkling tea. A cold sweat began to break out on his forehead, dripping down in line with the faint scar on the middle of his face. A noise from the room across the hall caught his frazzled attention. It was the familiar sound of darkness. Tears began pouring forth almost instantly as Saix felt his whole body grow cold. His shoes squeaking against the wood flooring, he made a beeline for Aerith's bedroom, hoping dearly it was Axel or Demyx making their exit. He skidded into the room and looked around for signs of Aerith and at first, saw nothing. Only with a second glance at the bed did Saix notice a delicate hand wedged between a night table and the dark green sheets. Saix trembled, tears stinging his eyes as he made his way slowly around the foot of the bed. There on the floor was Aerith, still in an elegant white nightgown, her eyes fixed on the roof, devoid of the spark of life. Blood was slowly trickling from the gash in her neck onto her matted light brown hair and to the floor. One arm was at her side, the other raised above her head, caught between the bed and the night table. Saix stood for a second or two in complete shock before he fell to his knees and screamed. It was a deep, guttural, pain-filled scream that made Axel and Demyx come running.

Axel was the first to see Saix on his knees in a pool of blood, with Aerith laying lifeless in his arms, quickly becoming stiff. Demyx came trotting up behind him and upon seeing this, turned his head and held his mouth, turning a greenish color in the face. Axel began to shake as he watched Saix rock gently back and forth, Aerith's blood staining his white shirt.

"S-Saix?" he whispered. There was no response from Saix who continued to rock, crying softly. Demyx clutched the hem of Axel's shirt desperately as he turned back around to look at the broken man on the floor, a tear in his own eyes.

"Saix...I'm...I'm so sorry." he said wearily. Saix stopped rocking and looked up at Demyx, his eyes glazed over once more.

"They did this..." he mumbled slowly, as if in a trance.

"Who?" asked Demyx. Saix stopped crying completely and a crazed look covered his face.

"The Organization." he hissed, setting Aerith gently onto the wood floor and standing. "The Organization..." he whispered, looking to Axel and Demyx before calling forth a column of darkness like the one he heard in the room earlier and disappearing into it. The pair of Nobodies stared at each other, concern smeared across their faces.

"He wouldn't..." began Axel.

"He would." Demyx said fearfully. As if their minds were in perfect unison, Axel and Demyx both disappeared in twin pillars of shadow.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Alright..." laughed Zexion lightly. "Alright, alright... so there's this little boy, and he's walking down the street with a frog on a string. He's walking and..."

"Zexion!" barked Luxord from the couch on the other side of the common area. "That joke is dirty. Tell a different one." he commanded, not looking up from the book he was browsing through. Zexion grumbled and lowered his voice, prompting Vexen to lean in closer to hear the rest of the 'dirty' joke.

"Let the kid live a little, Lux." griped Roxas, where he sat playing solitaire with a pack of Luxord's best cards.

"When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you..." Luxord said to the younger Nobody, again not looking up from his book. Roxas sighed, shaking his head and mumbling. Laxaeus chuckled from where he sat on another over-stuffed couch with Marluxia, the both of them tired from their fruitless search for Saix, Axel and Demyx. It was another lazy, uneventful afternoon that all in the Castle were thoroughly enjoying when a portal of darkness disrupted the quiet chatter. All in the room looked up to find Saix standing there in bloodied up street clothes, a deranged look in his eye. Zexion tensed and Vexen moved closer to him, not taking his eyes off of Saix who was looking to the seated members, trembling.

"Who..." he said through gritted teeth, unable to form many words with his rage. Marluxia stood and took a few steps toward him.

"Are you OK?" he asked, glancing at the blood on his shirt. "Saix, we've been looking all over for you. Look man, you have a lot of explaining t-..."

"WHO?!" cried Saix, shaking harder now. Marluxia stepped back a bit.

"Who what?" he asked tentatively.

"Who killed her?" Saix demanded in a demonic whisper. Everyone in the room exchanged fearful looks and Zexion grabbed onto Vexen's arm.

"Killed who?" ventured Marluxia.

"Aerith...my Aerith...she's dead..." Saix whispered. "And I know one of you sons of bitches had something to do with it." he growled. Marluxia glanced at Laxaeus, then at Roxas, who's fingers were twitching in anticipation.

"Saix, I think you should sit down..." Marluxia suggested, placing a careful hand on Saix's shoulders. Saix's golden eyes widened and he grabbed Marluxia's arm, twisting it and breaking the bones within. Marluxia cried out in pain, tears welling up in his eyes while Roxas's keyblade came crashing down on the back of Saix's head. Saix released Marluxia, who fell to the floor, holding his broken arm and sobbing wretchedly, Luxord and Vexen already on their feet to help him while Zexion cowered on the couch. Roxas clipped Saix across the shoulders and he roared, grabbing Roxas by the throat and throwing him with incredible force across the room and into a bookshelf...

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Xemnas!" cried Xigbar, stumbling from a portal of shadow. "Xemnas!" he called again, his voice echoing in the cavernous room. Xemnas stood from his desk, a concerned look on his otherwise fair face.

"What is it? Please keep your voice down." he said regally.

"Xemnas, we have a problem. A big problem." Xigbar gasped.

"What problem?" asked The Superior.

"That girl...Aerith...when I arrived, she was already dead." Xigbar said.

"You're lying." snapped Xemnas, his eyes narrowing.

"I'm not! I'm not! When I got to her house, she was dead on her floor. Someone slit her throat." Xigbar said pleadingly.

"You're just a glutton for punishment, aren't you?" Xemnas said coldly, picking up a knife and pointing it at Xigbar's good eye, reminding him of the last time Xigbar had disappointed him. Xigbar glared and grabbed Xemnas by his robe, shaking him violently.

"You arrogant jackass!" he spat. "Don't you understand? Someone else killed her! Someone in the Organization!

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"Roxas!" yelled Laxaeus, running to the boy's side. Saix had already rounded back on Zexion, who was stuck to the couch with fear.

"YOU!" he shouted over Marluxia's cries and Roxas's cursing. "You told The Superior about Aerith...you're the reason she's dead!" he cried, making his way slowly to the couch. He stepped over the broken table and lunged at Zexion. He felt a sharp pain across his cheek as a card-shaped shuriken glanced off his face.

"You stay away from him!" bellowed Luxord. Zexion sprang off the couch and moved to hide behind the seething wall of accent and lethality. Saix held his face and screamed back at Luxord.

"That little demon is the reason she's dead! He has to pay!"

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"And that means what to me?" asked Xemnas, brushing himself off.

"That means someone else knew about her. Which means someone else has been listening which means someone else knows everything else which means one of those skulking, wretched, brain-washed drones out there is _dangerous_." Xigbar hissed. Xemnas scoffed.

"And what do you suppose I do?" he asked pompously.

"Aw gee, I don't know... _your job!?_" cried Xigbar angrily.

"Don't you take that tone of voice with me, underling!" Xemnas commanded.

"Oh...fuck off." Xigbar grumbled with a wave of his hand, turning on his heel to exit the room. He stopped, sighed and turned back around. "Oh, and by the way, Saix was in Hollow Bastion. In the girl's house. Axel and Demyx were there too. I don't know what they were doing there, but now Saix knows she's dead. And I don't think the strangle-happy Berserker Boy is going to take that very well." Xigbar informed The Superior.

"Now that might be a problem." Xemnas nodded.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"You touch him and I swear, I'll rip out your throat." Luxord said darkly, narrowing his eyes.

"But it's _his fault!_" shouted Saix as Demyx and Axel appeared behind him.

"Saix! The hell are you doing?!" cried Axel. Saix turned around to face him, his eyes pained, red and full of tears, his voice hoarse.

"They killed her." Saix whimpered, the sound pathetic in his own ears.

"You don't know that." Demyx reasoned.

"Yes I do! I do!" Saix cried, sounding more and more like a beaten child with every syllable.

"Saix, knock it off!" Axel begged. Saix looked from Axel's beautiful, concerned face to the rubble around him. Luxord and Vexen stood as a wall of muscle and magic between he and Zexion, Roxas and Laxaeus had already left the room, seeking The Superior and Marluxia lay on the ground whimpering and cradling his arm.

"I'm...sorry. I'm so sorry." Saix choked, collapsing into Axel, who held him to his chest. "I'm sorry that I'm going to have to kill one of them..." he whispered. Before Axel had a chance to grab him, Saix had sprung at Vexen, his Berserker hammer appearing in his left hand, his right hand around the alchemist's throat. He raised the hammer effortlessly, prepared to bring it crashing down on Vexen's shocked head when from the right side came a fist that crashed into his already cut and bleeding face, sending him stumbling off to the left, tripping over his own hammer. Saix was assaulted again with a strong kick to his back that sent him flying into what was left of the bookcase he'd thrown Roxas into. A pile of marble and books fell on top of him and he lost consciousness. Standing next to Vexen triumphantly, panting and holding his broken arm, was Marluxia. The other Nobodies stared at him with awe and admiration.

"I always hated that crazy son of a bitch." he spat.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"So what do we do? Tell the others?" questioned Xemnas.

"No. Don't let the person know we're onto them." explained Xigbar, crossing his arms.

"So we wait. Flush them out slowly." Xemnas agreed, nodding. There was an eruption of darkness behind the two of them and a voice chuckled darkly.

"Oh, that won't be necessary." there was a sick crunch as bone and metal met, tearing a hole in Xemnas's chest. Xigbar stood, frozen with horror.

"N-no." he whispered fearfully. Another wet, scraping sound and Xigbar's head left his body, both pieces of the Sharpshooter falling to the pristine marble floor. Xemnas pressed a gloved hand to his chest desperately, blood pouring from it. He attempted to crawl away from his attacker, unable to use darkness to escape. He knew the man wasn't done with him. He didn't even have time to wonder if it would hurt before his glorious head was severed, too.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Well there you have it.  
Lots of death, lots of WTF moments.

I really didn't like this chapter. I played around with it and no matter what I did, it just didn't come out right. It took me three days to write this with all the obsessive revisions I did to this chapter and previous chapters. It's an important part, and a pivotal moment in the story and I just plain despise the whole thing.

And on a side note, I kind of want to do some explaining about Saix's behavior. I know it looks like I'm making him into a senseless crazy person, but there's reason behind it. In the game, Saix is a berserker, and prone to random bursts of strength and blah blah blah. Well in the game, there are also berserker Nobodies who are dragged around by a cursed hammer and completely unable to control their movements and what they do. That's pretty much the same idea I had for Saix. Strong emotion will set off is catatonic berserker state and he goes loony until someone bashes him on the head or makes him stop. He's not really good at controlling this side of him, much like he isn't that good at controlling the psychic part of him. That also comes into play later.

Anyway, I just wanted to clear that up so you all don't think I'm turning Saix into some crazed lunatic for no reason.


	7. Confrontation

Blarg.

I have like... no inspiration anymore. Probably from lack of internet and isolation from fellow Kingdom Hearts fans. I also think I'm getting sick. It happens. So... let's see if I can make my non-inspired brain work, eh?

A/N: On repeat today... "I'm not over"by Carolina Liar.

Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts isn't mine. I just like warping things.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"**Confrontation"**

"So what the hell do we do with him?" asked Luxord, staring at a still unconscious Saix. They had pulled him out of the rubble of the stone bookcase, and laid him out on the middle of the floor. He had cuts on his face and shoulders, but was breathing just fine.

"Throw him out a window?" suggested Zexion where he still cowered behind Vexen.

"Be nice, Zex. You have no idea what we walked into, OK?" said Axel, looking at Saix with remorse. The assembled stared at Axel, expecting an explanation.

"The girl he liked...she was dead when we got to her house and..." sniffled Demyx. "There was a lot of blood." he whispered to the floor, still clutching the hem of Axel's shirt. Zexion's face fell and he looked out the window to his right.

"Aerith is dead?" he croaked. Demyx and Axel nodded and Vexen turned to him.

"You knew about this? About the girl?" he asked. Zexion nodded.

"That's why he's been such a royal pain in the ass. Because he missed her and because he knew that if she ever found out what he was..." he sighed. "We had this conversation a while ago." said Zexion. The Nobodies all stared at Saix on the floor.

"That's why he went psycho?" Marluxia asked no one in particular, still cradling his arm.

"Love can make you do some pretty crazy things." Axel said, not mentioning that Zexion threatened to tell Xemnas about her. Demyx's eyes flickered up briefly, then back to the torn, pathetic mess of being on the floor. Luxord had his eyes closed, deep in thought. Suddenly, they flew open and he looked to Zexion.

"Who else knew? About Aerith?" he asked, piecing the puzzle together.

"Just Xigbar." murmured the boy.

"You don't think Xigbar would just kill her for no reason, do you? He's not that bad." Vexen said to Luxord, who was shaking his head, still thinking.

"No, but somebody did. Somebody from the Organization." Demyx imputed, telling them of the wooshing sound of darkness they heard in Aerith's room moments before she was found.

"You think Xemnas ordered her death?" Zexion thought out loud. Axel shook his head.

"I don't doubt it. But I don't think the member we heard depart was the one that killed her." he said, focusing on the wall behind Laxaeus and Marluxia.

"Why not?" asked Zexion.

"She was found on the floor. And there was so...so much blood. We would have heard a scream or a thud or something. You know as well as I do that random Organization members appearing out of nowhere is enough to scare someone into at least a gasp. Hell, it still scares me when Dusks pop up in my room at night." Demyx spoke, as if reading Axel's thoughts. All were quiet, thinking.

"So...who could it have been?" Marluxia asked.

"Anyone that wasn't there." said Vexen.

"Well who could it absolutely _not _be? Let's make a list." suggested Zexion.

"Saix..." began Axel. "Me, Demyx..." he looked to Luxord.

"Zexion and I were here the whole day." Luxord defended himself.

"Vexen, too." said Zexion from the couch.

"Laxaeus and I were in Twilight Town looking for you three..." said Marluxia.

"Which leaves Xemnas, Xigbar, Xaldin, Larxene and Roxas." Demyx proclaimed.

"I thought Roxas was here all day?" Zexion asked Luxord, who shook his head.

"No, he wasn't, now that I think about it." he mused. "He came into the room just moments before Saix appeared and asked me for a pack of cards."

"You don't honestly think that puny little..." began Marluxia in Roxas's defense when the boy came skidding into the room, Xaldin, Laxaeus and Larxene on his heels. He stopped just short of stepping on Saix's outstretched arm, bending over and holding his knees, panting.

"The...The Superior..." he gasped. Everyone in the common area looked at him, concerned, then to the Nobodies that had followed him.

"The Superior and Xigbar are dead." said Xaldin solemnly. Gasps echoed in the room and members of the Organization stared at each other in open-mouthed horror.

"They...they can't be. Not The Superior..." Zexion said in disbelief.

"Yes, The Superior." said Larxene, worry in her voice. "Someone killed him." she gasped, fighting tears of fear for her own safety.

"Someone like you?" Vexen glared at her.

"How dare you accuse her?!" Xaldin growled at Vexen, who shot him a poisonous look.

"Well if she didn't do it, who did? You? Maybe key-boy over there?" he said motioning to Roxas.

"I'll give you 'key-boy'." threatened Roxas with a scowl. Demyx detached himself from Axel's shirt and stood between Vexen and the others.

"Everyone just calm down, OK?" he said calmly.

"Calm down?! No one's accusing _you_ of murdering The Superior!" Xaldin shouted at him, Larxene crossing her arms and nodding in agreement.

"Look, it might not even have been one of us, alright?" Axel said to the quickly angering group.

"'_Might not_'." said Laxaeus sarcastically.

"It had to have been one of us." said Zexion solemnly from beside Luxord. "We're the only ones with access to the Castle." he murmured.

"Maybe it was a lesser Nobody, then." volunteered Luxord. Larxene scoffed.

"Trust me, it wasn't a lesser Nobody." he whispered, the gory scene flashing back into her mind.

"Then it was one of you guys!" Vexen said again, pointing to the group that hadn't been present for Saix's outburst.

"Well it sure as hell wasn't me!" said Roxas, placing a hand on his chest. "I was here with you guys." he said.

"Not the whole day." Demyx pointed out.

"Can it, creampuff." mumbled Roxas.

"The fuck did you call me?!" glared Demyx.

"Cream...puff." said Roxas.

"Say that again, I dare you! Say...it..._again_!" yelled Demyx, inching closer to Roxas.

"Creampuff!" Roxas spat. "Creampuff, creampuff, creampuff!" Roxas began shouting over Demyx's threats.

"Demyx, come on..." Axel urged, holding him back from lunging at Roxas.

"Hey Axel, keep your pet in check, would you?" complained Larxene when Demyx stepped on her foot in an attempt to get closer to Roxas, who was now staring him down. Axel's eyes widened and he let go of Demyx, who fell forward after putting all his weight into escaping the stronger man's grasp.

"Larxene, knock it off." said Zexion.

"I wasn't talking to you, daddy's boy." she snapped. Luxord growled, but Vexen's outstretched arm kept him from walking up to Larxene and smacking her.

"You're such a bitch." Zexion muttered.

"And you're a pussy." she shot back.

"No, that's Demyx." Roxas interjected.

"Fuck you, Roxas!" yelled Demyx, again under control by Axel.

"Yeah, you'd love that wouldn't you?" glared the keyblade bearer.

"So mature of you." commented Laxaeus.

"No one asked you!" Roxas spat.

"Well no one asked you either, murderer." said Vexen with poison in his voice.

"I'm not a fucking murderer!" Roxas shouted.

"Liar!" cried Vexen.

"I second that." said Demyx.

"Well I don't." Xaldin said calmly.

"Is that because you're the one that offed the Superior and Xigbar?" Larxene asked coldly.

"Oh, Larxene...shut up!" Axel yelled, giving up on holding Demyx back who was now an inch from Roxas's face, both boys yelling obscenities at each other.

"_You _shut up!" she shot back.

"How 'bout you both shut up?" suggested Zexion. Vexen chuckled.

"You'll get yours, beaker-boy." glared the diminutive blond. There was a thud from the side of the room where Roxas and Demyx were arguing. Roxas had punched Demyx in the jaw and the sitarist was on his back at Axel's feet, holding his face. Laxaeus helped him up, steadying him with large hands. When Demyx was able to see straight, he lunged right for the keyblade bearer, sending both of them crashing into the white, wooden card table, reducing it to splinters.

"Way to go, rockhead." snapped Xaldin.

"Keep pushing me! I dare you!" Laxaeus snapped back.

"There you go again! Just knock it off already!" pleaded Axel.

"You know what?!..." started Larxene. The sound of 10 Nobodies all arguing at once had become deafening. Laxaeus and Axel were trying unsuccessfully to pull Demyx off of Roxas, Larxene and Vexen were having a screaming match and slapping each other in the face, Marluxia and Zexion were calling Xaldin 'murderer' from across the room and Luxord stood amongst it all, shaking his head. Right as the arguments were at their peak, there was a loud groan from the floor that made them all stop and turn around.

"Shut up, shut up, shut _up_!" cried Saix desperately from the floor. He stood shakily, glaring at all of them.

"What the hell happened to you?" asked Larxene, wide-eyed at the sight of Saix covered in blood.

"Don't ask." he said gruffly. "And is there any logical explanation for you all acting like a bunch of attitudinal, bickering children?" he demanded. The members of the Organization hung their heads. "I didn't think so." Saix said hoarsely. "Now what...the _hell_...is going on?" he asked.

"Xemnas is dead, man." Zexion muttered.

"Xigbar, too." Demyx added from where he sat next to Roxas, still glaring, but glowing with pride at the sight of the keyblade bearer's cut and bloody lip.

"You've got to be kidding me." mumbled Saix.

"Afraid not." said Marluxia.

"So who the hell did it?" asked Saix, touching the gash on his cheek from Luxord's shuriken.

"We don't know. But it was a member of the Organization." said Axel, the tension in the room skyrocketing.

"How do you figure?" asked Saix, tearing off a piece of his shirt and pressing it to his face.

"We're the only ones with access to the Castle." said Vexen, prompting Saix to shake his head 'no'.

"We're not. Trust me, we're not. If someone else is strong enough to use the power of darkness and knows where to find us, they could waltz right in here and we'd never know the difference." he said, looking to his fellow denizens of darkness, watching the color drain from their faces.

"You can't be serious." whispered Luxord.

"Afraid I am. So while you all are over here trying to kill each other, there could be someone inside the Castle that's just waiting for you to fall asleep." said Saix bitterly. Everyone's eyes widened. "Look, I know you're all scared. But Xemnas and Xigbar are dead, OK? Dead. And one of us could be next. Fighting isn't going to solve anything. So I suggest we stick together. Never walk around alone. Groups of two or more. No sleeping alone, either." he listed.

"I hate to rain on your parade, Saix, but no one appointed you our boss." said Xaldin bitterly. Saix shot him a deathglare.

"Maybe not. But while you may be number three, I'm third in command. Just under Xigbar and Xemnas." he said. "And I'm just telling you all what I think would be best."

"This coming from someone who tried to kill Zexion, and then the rest of us?" asked Luxord. Marluxia nodded slowly in agreement, still babying his arm.

"Well...I agree with Saix." piped Zexion, to the surprise of all.

"Me, too." said Demyx.

"And me." muttered Axel. Vexen and Roxas raised their hands, tentatively.

"Fine. We'll listen to the crazy one." Xaldin muttered. Saix shot him a dirty look.

"Alright, starting now, no one go anywhere alone. Sleep with someone else in the room, or don't sleep at all. We clear?" said Saix. The others nodded. Things quieted down, though everyone was still on edge. The only things left standing in the common area were the couches where a few people were huddled, muttering apologies to each other and mending their fellow Organization members' wounds. Demyx, Axel and Saix sat off to the side.

"So do you think it was one of us? Or someone else?" asked Axel. Saix shook his head, a few chunks of bloody blue hair falling in his cut up face.

"I don't know." he said quietly, wincing when Demyx pressed a wet rag to the cut in his face.

"We might have to cauterize this." muttered the sitarist, shaking his head and prodding the laceration gently.

"I'll get on that later, nurse Demyx." Axel said with a laugh. Turning serious, he looked to Saix.

"So if it wasn't a member of the Organization, who was it?" he questioned. Saix shook his head again.

"Who knows?" he said. "But if it _is_ a member of the Organization, no one is safe. And whoever killed Xemnas and Xigbar killed my Aerith." he said sadly.

"You're sure of that?" whispered Demyx.

"Positive." he replied.

- - - - - - - - - - -

Kind of a filler chapter.

But while I was writing, I got some good ideas in my head.

So this should be interesting.

Your thoughts?


	8. In two's

I can't believe I've made it this far already.

Chapter 8!

So my inspiration is slowly returning as my sister continues to beat me and demand more Axel/Demyx action (though she hates Demyx with a fiery passion...yes, I know, we should sacrifice her to the Demyx Fangirl Gods). Hopefully this chapter turns out good as I try to keep from writing myself into a corner. It happens a lot.

A/N: Song playing on Winamp right now... "Sokubeni" by Dir en Grey.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Maybe in my head, I do.

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"**In two's"**

As instructed by Saix, everyone partnered up for the night. Choosing one room to sleep in as opposed to two, with one person staying up and the other catching a few hours of uneasy sleep. Everyone knew that Luxord would demand to stand watch over Zexion and Roxas for the night, which meant Vexen was stuck with Larxene. Marluxia and Laxaeus opted to look out for one another, seeing as neither of them needed much sleep and enjoyed conversation much more. The powerhouses Xaldin and Saix took a room, no doubt destined to argue and snap at each other the whole time. That just left Axel and Demyx. Outwardly, Demyx was uninterested at the decision, made by Saix. Inside, he was screaming. He knew Saix did it intentionally and wasn't sure if he wanted to sock him in the face and break the skin on his freshly cauterized wound, or hug him till he couldn't breathe. It was decided that they would sleep in Axel's room, since it was closer to Saix and Xaldin and of all the people in the Organization, they were the scariest.

"I hope you don't mind the mess..." Axel said sheepishly, picking up pieces of street clothes and tossing them aside.

"It's not as bad as I expected." Demyx said honestly, bringing a grin to Axel's lips.

"Well...mine's one of the smaller rooms in the Castle, so we can't get another bed in here." he grumbled. Demyx went pale, a lump growing in his throat.

"Does that mean we sleep in the same bed?" he asked softly. Axel's back was turned to the sitarist as he attempted to clean up his room, but his eyes widened.

"Uh...n-no. I mean...we don't have to. I'm probably just gonna sit on the chair and keep watch." he swallowed dryly.

"You don't have to keep watch." Demyx said, suddenly feeling bad.

"It's alright. I really don't sleep much anyway. Usually I just lay in bed all night and stare at the ceiling. Besides... you need your rest after the way you tore after Roxas today." said Axel with pride in his voice. Demyx blushed, turning the edges of the purple and blue bruise on his face a rosy pink.

"He had it coming to him." he muttered. Axel nodded, throwing a pillow onto the bed and fluffing it.

"I know he did. I'm proud of you." he smiled at Demyx, who blushed harder. Axel turned around to face Demyx. The pink of his cheeks must have made the bruise stick out more, because Axel shook his head and sighed.

"We should put some ice to that." he muttered, picking up a glass from his night table and holding it up to Demyx who stared at him blankly. He shook the glass a bit, smiling and Demyx rolled his eyes, snapping his fingers. The glass filled slowly to the top with water as if poured from and invisible jug. "I'm gonna take this to Vexen for freezing. Be right back!" Axel said with a wave, heading out the door.

Demyx again waited until he could no longer hear Axel's footfalls. He stood awkwardly in the room, looking around at all of Axel's things. The glowing red flame in the corner didn't seem so bright with the lights on, but it was still beautiful. Axel's small closet was overflowing with spare robes and random pieces of street clothes, a few other personal effects spilled from it as well. Demyx looked closer and discovered that there were several pictures in the clutter. One in particular caught his attention, and Demyx picked it up. It was of a beautiful woman with flowing vermilion hair, like Axel's, and a glorious smile. She was standing in front of a stone wall, next to a small, inset fountain, moss and vines growing behind her. Her long hair was tied back and laid over her left shoulder. Her clothes were simple, though she wore them well. The sky blue of her dress was most flattering, despite her loud hair. Demyx wasn't one for the ladies, but even he couldn't deny her beauty. Demyx wondered if Axel was attracted to her, and his heart fell.

"Beautiful, isn't she?" came a voice from the door, making Demyx jump. Axel was leaning against the door frame smiling, the cup in his hand full of ice cubes.

"So nice of him to cut it into cubes." said Demyx.

"Yeah well, he needed something to take his frustration out on. He's stuck with Larxene. And man, did I catch it for walking around alone. He's such a stickler for the rules..." Axel complained, stepping into the room and closing the door, setting the glass of ice on his night table. He sat down on the edge of his bed and sighed, looking at Demyx who was still holding the picture. "My mother..." he smiled at the blond.

"Uh...I'm sorry, what?" asked Demyx. Axel chuckled.

"The picture. That's my mother. Well...my other's mother, but..." he shrugged. Demyx nodded, smiling.

"She's beautiful." he whispered.

"She's still alive, too. I've wanted to go and visit her, but it wouldn't be right of me." sighed Axel. Demyx bit his lip, setting the picture back down where he found it.

"So you... feel attached to her, then?" Demyx pressed. Axel nodded slowly, keeping his eyes on his hands that were resting on his knees.

"I suppose so. I've always known The Superior was wrong about us not having hearts or feeling." Axel admitted. "He has to be. I mean... look at Luxord and Zexion. You know their others were father and son, right?" Axel asked Demyx, who shook his head.

"Who told you that?" he asked.

"Larxene. She said that Xigbar told her Xemnas admitted to us having the ability to feel connected." whispered Axel. Demyx's face fell.

"I just can't believe they're dead." he said quietly. "It's terrifying to think that we could be next."

"Don't think like that, Dem." Axel soothed. "I'll protect you. I promised...remember?" he asked, for the first time in days, recalling the night on the Brink of Despair. Demyx trembled.

"I remember." he whispered.

"Good. Now come here..." Axel said, patting the bed next to him. "I didn't just go get bitched at by Cap'n Cold for nothing." he muttered, plucking an ice cube from the glass. Demyx complied, walking across the small room and taking a seat next to Axel. He wondered if Axel could hear his heartbeat as it thrummed in his ears. Axel pressed the ice to Demyx's face, making him wince. More from the cold than the pain. He continued to hold it there, gingerly while Demyx breathed in and out slowly. There was no sound but the gently hum of the light in the ceiling and the drops of water melting off the ice as they fell onto Demyx's cloaked shoulder.

"So what happens now?" he asked Axel.

"What do you mean?" asked the redhead, pulling the ice away to check if the swelling had gone down.

"I mean... our leader is dead. Does that mean our cause is, too?" asked Demyx feebly. Axel bit his lip, thinking.

"Of course not. We wait around a bit, find out who killed Xemnas and Xigbar, tear them limb from limb, pick up the pieces and move on. All of his experiments were properly chronicled and stored in a safe place should something like this happen. Xemnas wasn't an idiot." Axel said.

"And who will lead us?" whispered Demyx.

"Saix, most likely. Or Xaldin." Axel answered. Demyx sighed and nodded, Axel still applying ice to his cheek. They sat in silence for a number of moments before Demyx spoke again.

"I do feel bad for Saix." he said quietly. Axel nodded his agreement, using the corner of his black sheets to dab away some water from Demyx's face. "How is he taking it?" Demyx asked.

"Hard. Very, very hard. He just won't let it show. But you can see it in his eyes." Axel sighed. After a few more moments of icing, Axel tossed what was left of the cube back into the glass. "The swelling's gone down." he announced. Demyx smiled up at him.

"Thanks, Axel."

"No problem. So uh... I'm gonna go take a shower. You OK with staying by yourself?" asked Axel, scratching the back of his head. "Oh what am I talking about? I should take you with me." he shook his head. Demyx raised a gloved hand to silence him.

"I'll be fine." he nodded. "Go take a shower."

"Hmmm... 'are you implying that I smell'?" smiled Axel. Demyx caught on.

"'That, and I think a nice shower will cheer you up.'" he grinned. Axel nodded happily, standing and patting Demyx on the shoulder.

"Alright, I'll be back. Make yourself at home."Axel called behind him as he collected his towel and headed back out the door. Demyx was alone again in the room. He quickly removed his robe and pants, pulling on a loose white shirt and blue sleeping pants. He didn't want Axel to walk back into the room, having forgotten something, and see him with his shirt off. Demyx would just die. He balled his robe and pants up and tossed them into the corner below the flame, laying down on Axel's bed. It was softer than his, perhaps because it saw more use. Demyx rolled over, burying his face in the soft pillow. It smelled like Axel. It wasn't a strong or unpleasant smell, that was for sure. But it was a smell Demyx would remember for the rest of his life. It was almost delicate, but manly. Like fresh-cut flowers and aftershave. He breathed deep, calm settling over him. He pulled the sheets up over his legs, hugging the spare pillow. He loved being wrapped in Axel's scent, in his linens. It was so intimate. He felt warmth spread to every inch of his body and it was in that moment that he realized...he hadn't slept in two whole days. Though Demyx hadn't meant it, he found himself slipping into a shallow slumber, dancing along the edges of consciousness and sleep. There was a lovely half-dream forming in his hazed mind. In the dream, there was a lake doused in moonlight, surrounded by trees. In the middle of the lake was Axel, waist deep in the dark water, his hair wet and stuck to his back, a smile on his face, his eyes closed. As he moved, the water rippled around his middle, distorting his beautiful reflection like a shattered mirror. The dream-Axel moved through the water, dragging his fingertips along it's glassy surface, grinning up at the moon. He turned to face Demyx, a gleam in his eyes as they were intensified by the low light.

"Demyx..." he whispered seductively, a smile curling his lush lips. "Demyx..." he whispered again.

"Demyx?" Axel said from the other side of the room as he shut the door. Demyx's eyes flew open and he sat up quickly, looking around until his eyes settled on Axel. There he stood, dripping wet with only a towel around his middle, scratching the back of his head. His usual spikes were replaced with a long, straight curtain of red hair that fell in wet chunks around his shoulders. Demyx wondered if the half-naked God in front of him was as willing to restart his heart as he was willing to make it stop. "Sorry, I just didn't know if you were asleep." Axel muttered sheepishly.

"It's-s OK." Demyx muttered. "I wasn't asleep."

"I noticed." Axel chuckled, crossing the room to his closet, plucking a pair of boxers from the mess. He sniffed them, grimaced, and tossed them back into the closet, digging deeper for another pair. Axel dug until he found a satisfyingly 'clean' pair of plain black boxers. He began to pull off his towel and looked to Demyx expectantly. Demyx flushed and quickly turned his head, staring at the wall, trying to control his rapid breathing. Maybe it wasn't too obvious?

"Alright. You get some sleep." Axel sighed, pulling a black, wooden chair from the corner and sitting in it backwards, resting his arms and chin on the back of it.

"I'm not tired." Demyx lied.

"You're tired and you know it. Sleep. For me? Please?" Axel asked, feeling a tad guilty pulling the 'for me' card. Demyx wrinkled his nose, knowing he couldn't argue. He looked up at Axel where he sat smiling, his spikes returning as his hair dried. He swallowed audibly.

"Do you have t-to sit there?" he asked Axel.

"Well, no. I can go sit by the door if you want." Axel volunteered.

"No no. That's not what I meant... I meant... could you maybe...sit with me?" Demyx muttered, unable to look up, positive that his cheeks now matched the flame in the corner. Axel remembered the words Demyx whispered to him that night on the Brink. He smiled inside.

"Sure, Demyx." came his soft reply. He stood from the chair, placing it back in the corner and turned off the light so the room was lit only with a soft, red glow. Demyx moved over in the bed, holding his breath as Axel sat down on the bed with him, cross legged and on top of the sheets. "This better"? Axel asked with a smile that Demyx could feel.

"Yeah." he whispered. "But... are you sure you won't be uncomfortable? I mean... sitting like that all night?"

"I don't know." Axel played along. Did Demyx know he saw right through him? "I suppose I could lay down." he yawned. Demyx's heart skipped a number of beats as Axel lifted the covers and slid into bed next to him. Axel rolled onto his side and looked at Demyx in the dim light, barely inches from his face. Axel could hear how fast he was breathing, and how he tried to keep it under control. "You don't let me fall asleep." Axel whispered. Demyx nodded, fighting the urge to scream. Instead, he reached up and gripped one of Axel's hands tightly.

"Don't let anything happen to me, OK?" he pleaded. A strange compulsion came over Axel. One that he hadn't felt in so long. He was mere inches from Demyx's face, and he moved in closer. The tip of his nose brushed Demyx's lips as he let out a shuddering breath. Demyx began to tremble and Axel laced his fingers with the sitarist's. With his other arm, he pulled Demyx close to his own shaking body, feeling the boy's warmth through his soft shirt. Demyx tensed and looked into Axel's emerald eyes with the soft, scared eyes of a young boy in love. Axel kissed his neck gently, smiling against the soft, warm skin. He ran his fingers through Demyx's hair, looking into his eyes, offering his soul to those eyes.

"I won't let anything happen to you..." Axel whispered, his lips touching Demyx's with the barest of touches, like ash in the wind. "I promise." Axel closed his eyes, hearing Demyx draw a shallow breath, feeling the rush of air around his own lips, barely a few centimeters from the other boy's. Just a little...bit...more...

"Axel!" Came a cry from the hall way. Axel sat up abruptly, falling out of bed, hitting his elbow on the wall.

"Ah! Fuck. What?!" he yelled at the door, which flung open to reveal Vexen, carrying a robe that was dripping with what looked like water. Luxord was standing behind him, trembling. That's when he realized that the robe wasn't a robe. It was Zexion. And that wasn't water.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

You thought they were gonna kiss, didn't you?

Don't you hate it when that happens?

OK, seriously... this is one of my better chapters, in my opinion. I'm actually quite proud of it.

I kinda have _some_ idea of where I want to go from here, but I'm still not sure.

Which is why I need feedback. It _is_ helpful.


	9. Strength of a different kind

Oh hai!

To anyone who is actually still reading this, thank you SO much! Even more thanks to the people who actually review and add me to their loverly lists of Alerts and Favorites.

I pretty much have it in my head now about what I really want to do with this story. It was up in the air for so long, but as I wrote I just kinda eliminated options for myself and I'm quite happy with what I ended up with. Hope you are, too.

A/N: Our musical selection for Chapter 9 is "Rosetta Stoned" by Tool. (Which is the absolute _greatest_ band in existence.)

Disclaimer: I am not Tetsuya Nomura, and I do not own Kingdom Hearts. But if I ever met that man, I'd probably faint. He's a genius to end all geniuses. Seriously.

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"**Strength of a different kind"**

"Holy shit, what happened?" cried Axel, pulling on a pair of pants and rushing over to Vexen and Luxord. Demyx stared from the bed, still in shock.

"He was attacked." sniffled Luxord. Axel was brushing Zexion's hair back from his face, the once pale blue locks were now a deep red that could rival Axel's.

"You let him out alone?!" Axel accused Luxord angrily.

"No! You really think I'd do that? I fell asleep and he snuck out." Luxord whimpered. Axel shook his head, closely examining the lacerations that seemed to decorate the boy's entire body. They were deep and unforgiving. He had several crescent-shaped marks on his face, and a deep gash across his chest. His left arm had almost been completely severed, and there were punctures along his side and back. It looked like someone had used him as a pincushion. He was unconscious and bleeding in Vexen's arms. Axel looked over his shoulder and ordered Demyx out of the bed and he complied, leaping out from under the black sheets. They set Zexion on the bed and almost immediately, the sheets became soaked with his blood.

"Do something!" Vexen cried desperately. Axel knelt beside the bed and took a deep breath. He gently pulled what was left of the robe off of Zexion and, focusing intently, called up several small flames that danced along the boy's broken body, searing the wounds shut and stopping the bleeding. Zexion's breathing quickened as though he could feel the burning of his flesh, but he didn't open his eyes. Axel carefully worked to seal up the wounds on his face, trying not to scorch off any bits of Zexion's blood-soaked hair. When everything had been closed up as best as it was going to get, Axel grabbed a rag from the floor and dipped it into the glass of ice, which had all melted. It was still delightfully cool as he carefully scrubbed Zexion clean. Luxord, Vexen and Demyx watched with amazement at how gentle and skilled the flamboyant, rude fire-wielder could be.

"Is he going to be OK?" Luxord asked in a terrified whisper. Axel nodded, pressing the rag to Zexion's forehead as his breathing slowed to normal.

"He should be just fine. But why the hell did he leave the room alone?" Axel mused out loud.

"We think he was trying to get to Saix. Something about using his mind-reading ability to find out who killed Xemnas and Xigbar. He'd mentioned it earlier." Vexen mumbled from beside Demyx. Axel's eyes widened.

"Saix..." he whispered, standing and handing the rag to Demyx. "Dem, I need you to finish cleaning him up. I have to talk to Saix."

"But...But I..." began the sitarist. Axel held his hand gently.

"Please. I need you to do this, OK?" he muttered. Demyx nodded, seeing a smile flash across Axel's face before he bounded out of the room and down the hall.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The room was suddenly bathed in blinding white light from the hallway, making Xaldin wince where he sat at Saix's desk, sketching mindlessly to pass the time.

"The hell?" he mumbled gruffly, shielding his eyes from the light.

"Saix. Is Saix awake?" asked the breathless, silhouetted figure in the doorway.

"Axel?" Xaldin asked curiously.

"Yeah, it's me. Is Saix awake?" he asked, walking into the room that was considerably larger than his own. Xaldin looked over his shoulder, shrugging.

"I am now..." Saix groaned, sitting up in bed and looking at Axel. His blue hair was disheveled and Axel noticed that Saix's chest was even whiter than his own.

"Saix... Zexion was attacked." he breathed.

"What?!" cried Xaldin.

"You serious?" asked Saix, scratching his head, the blue stands of soft hair falling into place beneath his fingernails.

"No, I'm lying." said Axel sarcastically.

"Smartass." Saix mumbled. "Who attacked him?"

"The same person who killed Xemnas and Xigbar." Axel shuddered.

"How bad is it?" Saix asked, waking up and turning serious.

"Bad. I cauterized his wounds, but..." Axel sighed shakily. "He lost a lot of blood."

"So you're saying he might not make it?" Saix's eyes shone through the dark, seeking the honesty in Axel's.

"I'm not sure. Luxord and Vexen are in my room right now with Demyx and Zexion..." Axel muttered, motioning with his thumb over his shoulder. Saix climbed out of bed and began pulling on a pair of pants.

"Vexen's there, too?" he asked, buttoning the tight black pants.

"You know Vexen. He's like Zexion's second father." Axel mumbled. Saix ran his fingers through his hair briskly and pulled on a clean robe, but didn't zipper it.

"Which means he left Larxene alone." Saix grumbled, making his way to the door, his open robe flying out behind him.

"Larxene will be fine." Axel said. Saix nodded and looked over his shoulder at Xaldin.

"You should come with us." he said and Xaldin shook his head, looking pale.

"I'm not good with blood, you know that." he trembled. Saix groaned and shook his head.

"Then stand outside at least." Saix told him. Xaldin nodded, following the two other Nobodies down the hall.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The hall was eerily silent and bright. The only sound was the swishing of robes and the murmur of conversation from Marluxia and Laxaeus's room. They decided not to involve them, and in the back of his head, Saix wondered guiltily how Marluxia's arm was. When the three Nobodies were a few feet from the door, they saw Vexen standing outside, sobbing.

"Vex?" Axel asked, approaching him. "Vex, what's wrong?"

"He... he won't open his eyes." Vexen muttered. Xaldin and Axel hung their heads, Saix brushing past the three of them, pushing the door open and stepping inside.

"How is he?" Saix asked Demyx as he walked into the room. Demyx looked up from the side of the bed where he sat, holding Zexion's hand. Zexion's fingers were wrapped feebly around Demyx's, though they were barely holding on. Demyx's eyes were shining with unshed tears.

"He's not good, Sai. He won't open his eyes and it was a miracle, getting him to take my hand." he whispered. Saix sighed deeply, looking at the boy on Axel's bed. He looked so frail, and so broken. There was still blood smeared across his face and chest where Demyx had given up trying to wipe it all off. The gouge in his chest was bleeding around the edges where even the burning wasn't enough to stem the flow of precious blood. It wasn't a trickle, either.

"W-where's Luxord?" Saix murmured, tearing his eyes away from Zexion.

"He went to go check on Roxas." Demyx answered.

"He left him?" Saix asked, exasperated.

"You blame him? Roxas was asleep." Demyx defended Luxord.

"And an even more vulnerable target." Saix growled.

"Roxas will be fine. Is Vexen still out there?" asked Demyx, nodding to the door. Saix nodded.

"Yeah. Axel and Xaldin, too." he sighed. There was an uneasy silence as Demyx continued to fight back tears and Saix looked around the room at Axel's filth, grimacing at the sight of his underwear laying about in piles, despite the dismal situation.

"D...D-Demyx?" Zexion whispered, his voice as faint and fading as his breathing. Demyx stared wide-eyed at the boy before him. Saix squeezed Demyx's shoulder gently.

"I'll be outside." he whispered, only the sound of his footsteps and robe as he departed.

"Demyx..." Zexion said a little louder.

"Zexion? Zex, are you OK?" Demyx whispered, holding Zexion's hand again.

"No...n-no, I'm not." he breathed. Demyx felt a tear slide down his face.

"You're gonna be fine. You have to be." he muttered.

"You were always the optimist." smiled Zexion, finally opening his eyes to look at Demyx. Even his eyes were bloody, his left eye completely red where there should be white, like paint splashed across a pure, clean canvas.

"Zexion, you can't die. You can't! You don't know what that would do to Vexen and...and to your dad." Demyx muttered the last part, unsure if he should know about that particular connection. Zexion's eyes flashed at the mention of Luxord, and he closed them again.

"They'll be fine. After all...they're nothing. Just like me. The connection we shared was a fluke." he said, wincing as another piece of seared flesh tore away from pale, smooth skin on his chest, giving way to another small river of blood.

"No. Zexion...Zex, it's real. We have hearts. Deep down, under everything we were ever taught...we have hearts. We've had them all along. All we had to do was believe." Demyx whispered, tears falling from his face to Zexion's hand.

"And everyone called you the weakling..." Zexion mused out loud. "I always knew you were strong." he whispered. Demyx shook his head.

"I'm not. Not like you. Not like most of the Organization." Demyx said.

"I never said you were a good fighter." Zexion corrected him. "I said you were strong."

"How am I strong?" Demyx whispered, rubbing his thumb gently against the back of Zexion's sliced up hand.

"You're not like Axel. Or Saix. But you have strength, Demyx. Of a different kind." he smiled through the pain. Demyx smiled too, holding Zexion's hand tighter.

"Thank you." he choked. Zexion nodded slowly. More blood began pouring from his chest and he could feel the various cuts and punctures on his body begin to throb. He closed his eyes tightly, feeling the blood trickle down his chest and the side of his face.

"I'm-m sorry I didn't get a look at the son of a bitch..." he muttered to Demyx.

"What?" asked the sitarist.

"The asshole who did this to m-me. If I'd s-seen him, you guys could..." Zexion attempted to speak, only to begin coughing uncontrollably, sending flecks of blood from his pale and trembling lips in a spray across Axel's bed. Demyx squeezed Zexion's hand.

"It's OK...don't say anything." he soothed. Zexion nodded, lacing his fingers with Demyx's.

"You know... I always l-liked you and Axel. You w-were the only other members I could stand besides Vexen and my dad." he smiled. Demyx let the tears fall freely now, and he sniffled, watching Zexion's chest rise and fall with effort. "Tell Axel that f-for me, will you?" he gasped. Demyx nodded.

"I will." he whispered tearfully. A deep laceration on Zexion's side split and blood poured forth onto Axel's bed. Zexion gasped and began to cry feebly.

"It...it h-hurts." he sobbed. "I want my dad..."

"Luxord!" Demyx cried desperately there was no answer, but there was a scuffling of feet outside the door as someone ran to fetch him.

"Thank y-you..." Zexion said in tears.

"For what?" asked Demyx, shaking as hard as the other boy.

"For this. All of this." he whispered. "Good luck, Demyx." Luxord and Vexen came running into the room, panting and stepping over Axel's mess. Demyx began crying uncontrollably, shaking and stroking Zexion's bloody hair and forehead, tracing his lips with his thumb. He pressed a trembling kiss to the corner of the other boy's mouth, feeling the dried blood. Demyx stood shakily, letting Luxord fall to his knees beside the bed, not bothering to hold back his raw sadness. Vexen stood behind him, too numb to say a word or shed a tear. He only pressed the back of his hand to his mouth, watching in horror as Zexion slipped away in his father's gaze. Demyx cast one last look at Zexion and tore out of the room, sobbing and holding his stomach. He fell out of the room and into Axel's arms. He pressed his face into the chest of the larger man, sobbing wretchedly, wrapping his arms around him and fisting his bloody hands in Axel's hair. He continued to sniffle and sob until an anguished cry from the room assured them of Zexion's fate, and Demyx cried harder, wailing into Axel's chest. Larxene, Roxas, Marluxia and Laxaeus had managed to stumble out of their rooms at the earlier commotion and shed tears as well. Larxene's wall finally broke and she clung to Roxas, who patted her back and she sobbed into his shoulder. Marluxia and Laxaeus stood as immovable walls of masculinity, but tears streamed down their faces. Xaldin and Saix looked at each other miserably. They all waited and waited until they heard the soft sound of Zexion's body fading back into nothing, leaving only bloodstains and tears on Axel's sheets. A few moments after, Vexen stumbled out of the room, supporting Luxord who was barely able to stay sane, let alone walk. He clung to Vexen's robe, sniffling and choking, saliva and tears pouring down the front of his robe.

"I'm taking him to the common area." Vexen whispered to Axel. He turned briefly to Saix, all traces of malice or discontent gone from his eyes. "He forgives you." he nodded. At this, Saix's face twisted with sadness and he pressed a fist to his mouth, closing his eyes tightly, tears streaming from them.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Sniffle

So sad.

Poor Organization XII!

Was that or was that not the absolute worse death scene ever?


	10. At long last

WoOt! ChApTeR tEn!

Haha...if I really typed like that, I'd have to kick my _own_ ass.

Alright, so things are kinda coming to the climax and I'm sure that by now, I've lost 99.9 of my readers. I know that I'm really, _really_ off on some of the characters' behavior but (ashamed confession time) I've never played Chain of Memories. I started playing, then my friend decided to be an ass and be like "No! I want my game back, nya nya nya..." so I'm guessing at most of it. Bear with me.

A/N: Music for today... "The Nobodies" by Marilyn Manson (no one else finds that funny? 'cause they're nobodies and the song...it's about... ahem ...I'll shut up.)

Disclaimer: I wish I owned Kingdom Hearts and was making money off of this. I could buy a new computer and not have to face whatever malevolent force is tearing apart my startup files every single time I turn the damn thing on. But alas...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"**At long last"**

The Castle was silent, save for the sniffling and heavy, tearful breathing of what was left of Organization XIII. The sadness they all felt for themselves and Luxord at the loss of Zexion was matched only by their fear of whoever attacked and killed him. It amazed most members that they were able to feel such remorse for one Nobody, even when two others had already died gruesome deaths. Perhaps it was because one of the deceased Nobodies lied to them. And the other never let anyone in. Not like Zexion. Sure, he had his moments. Everyone had wanted to slap him across the face for one of his snide remarks at least once since they'd known him, even Luxord. But deep down, the kid was good. The usual blinding white of the Castle seemed to dim at the loss of one of the Organization's most beloved members.

Saix had rightfully decided that it was too dangerous to sleep in twos or even threes in a room, and said that it was best if they all find a way to catch sleep in the common area. Two beds had been dragged out of nearby rooms to accommodate those that were left. Larxene and Roxas slept uneasily on one bed, huddled against each other for security and warmth while Marluxia and Xaldin slumbered on opposite sides of the other small bed, stretching the blanket they shared to the point of it tearing. Saix, Axel and Vexen were designated to keep watch, though Luxord was far too upset to sleep. He only sat on the couch, staring at the floor and occasionally heaving a shuddering sigh. Demyx had fallen asleep on the couch, his head in Axel's lap. Axel stayed diligent, staring around the room with flashing green eyes. He absently stroked Demyx's back through his shirt, resting his hand on the sitarist's shoulder when he wasn't twisting the soft strands of hair between his fingers gently. Nothing moved. Nothing dared to. Axel and Saix spoke in hushed whispers about what would happen to them all now. Axel suggested leaving the Castle for a while and perhaps finding somewhere else to call home. Saix shot the idea down, of course. Roxas whimpered in his sleep, tossing and turning while Demyx snored silently in Axel's lap. Vexen, Axel and Saix had begun to nod off into a hazy state of semi-sleep when a dull thud and pained yelp from behind them snapped them back to alertness. They turned to see Marluxia laying on the floor beside the bed. He'd fallen off and landed on his broken arm.

"There's no way I'm fuckin' getting any sleep now..." he mumbled angrily, holding his arm to his chest, his eyes shining with a few tears of pain. "Vexen, you can sleep for a while if you want. Just don't expect to get any of the blanket." he said, motioning to the bed where Xaldin slept.

"I'm really sorry about that, you know..." Saix muttered sheepishly as Marluxia flopped down onto the couch beside Axel with a scowl.

"Sure you are." Marluxia growled. Saix hung his head.

"Is there anything I can do?" he asked. Marluxia sighed, staring up at the ceiling that glimmered a brilliant white in the low, low light of the small lamps of the common area.

"Can you instantly heal a broken bone?" he asked.

"You know, it _will_ heal in a few days." Saix offered. "Until then, I can get you a sling or something." Marluxia shook his head.

"I'm fine." he sighed.

There was more silence as Vexen settle in for an uneasy slumber and Marluxia took to holding his arm to his chest, prodding it gently. Morning soon came as Saix became weary and other members began to wake. Demyx was among the first. He opened his beautiful eyes slowly, the aquamarine beauties adjusting to the light, his lashes fluttering softly. He sat up, stretching and yawning. He looked to Axel with a smile, then around him at the members huddled in the common area for safety. His face fell instantly.

"I was hoping it was a dream..." he whispered sadly to Axel, who nodded slowly, dragging his fingertips lightly along Demyx's jawline, but only briefly. A small smile curled the corners of Demyx's lips as he leaned into the touch. It was so comforting, so fulfilling. Like being all alone in the world and finding the one other person alive in the vastness of existence. Vexen's eyes flickered to this show of affection, but he turned his head with Saix, engaging Marluxia in conversation so not to draw attention to the pair of pained lovers. Demyx stretched again, the leather cushions of the couch groaning under his weight. He searched his pockets with fingers still numb with sleep for the pack of cigarettes he hadn't touched since his first trip to Hollow Bastion. His delicate features twisted into a scowl when he discovered that he'd smoked his last cigarette while walking to Aerith's house. Remembering the incident made his heart sink. He climbed off the couch slowly, taking clumsy, sleepy steps to the couch where Saix was seated. He sat down cross-legged in front of their makeshift leader and smiled up at him.

"Can me and Axel take a trip? I mean... is it safe?" he asked sweetly. Saix noticed that Demyx became particularly child-like in the morning, and it made him smile.

"Where and for what?" he asked softly. Demyx's eyes flashed with sadness as he decided against mentioning Hollow Bastion.

"To get cigarettes." he said sheepishly. Saix's nose wrinkled as he thought and Axel stared out a nearby window, pretending to be uninterested in the verdict.

"I guess it's all right." Saix muttered. "Just don't wander off." he sounded tired, drained, his voice was a raspy whisper and his eyes had lost their shine. Demyx only smiled, standing from his seat on the floor. Demyx's street clothes were in Axel's room. No one really wanted to go back into it, but Axel braved the memories and dashed in quickly, grabbing a loose pair of blue jeans and a tight red shirt for himself. He dug through Demyx's belongings, careful not to glance at his bloodstained bed. He figured that a pair of black pants and white and blue shirt would suffice. He remembered briefly, the wind and how it would whip around Demyx, making him shiver. On his way out, he grabbed Demyx's big black jacket. Axel set off down the hall, listening to his own footsteps echo off the marble that glistened to all sides of him. He stepped quietly back into the common area, making Saix and Marluxia jump at the sound. He held up the street clothes with a smile and Demyx beamed at him from the couch.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

"So..." Demyx said as he walked in step with Axel through the crowded marketplace. "Do I get ice cream again?" he smiled. Axel shrugged.

"That depends." he said to the younger man, who frowned.

"On what?" asked Demyx. Axel swallowed a lump in his throat and looked down at the beautiful blond in front of him. Sighing and smiling, he pressed his forehead to Demyx's.

"It depends..." he whispered, taking Demyx's hands and kissing them gently. He kept one hand firmly in his own. "On whether or not you'll walk with me like this." he smiled, squeezing Demyx's hand. The sitarist's pulse leaped into his throat and he blushed a deeper red than Axel's hair. He smiled wide, happiness filling his chest, spreading to every inch of his body. Demyx pressed the back of his hand, covered by his over-sized jacket sleeve, to his mouth to hide the ridiculous grin and giggled, nodding vigorously. Axel beamed, kissing Demyx's forehead and lacing his fingers gently with the other boy's. Demyx continued to blush as they walked through the throng of people as they haggled over prices and shouted at one another. Axel brushed the back of Demyx's hand lightly with his thumb, smiling. They purchased ice cream from the stand, though Marnela wasn't in sight. Axel and Demyx continued to walk, hand in shaking hand, until they'd cleared the mass of people and found a semi-secluded spot near the marketplace. The aged stone wall there was just higher than Axel's waist and he gently lifted Demyx, setting him on top of it. Axel stood in front of Demyx, who blushed when Axel nestled himself between his legs, pressing himself against the wall to get closer to the boy. Axel leaned forward, wrapping the trembling sitarist in a hug, gently kissing his neck, breathing in his scent, watching the Rising Falls where they roared in the distance. Demyx sighed contently, placing a hand on Axel's back, running the other through his fiery hair.

"Does this mean you like me?" Demyx asked in a soft voice, knowing the question was silly. Axel chuckled lightly against Demyx's neck. He straightened himself, looking into Demyx's eyes, gently holding his face, stroking his soft cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

"Yes..." he said with a laugh. "I like you, Demyx."

The sitarist smiled wide, looking off to the side, then back at Axel.

"Lots and lots?" he asked sweetly. Axel pressed his forehead to Demyx's, resting his arms around his neck.

"Lots and lots." he whispered, sending shivers down Demyx's spine. The world around them seemed to stand still as Demyx's hands found Axel's and Demyx found his voice.

"Can...c-can I kiss you?" he whispered shyly, putting his head down and turning a brighter red than ever before. Axel pulled a hand away from Demyx's loose grip and placed a soft finger under Demyx's chin, tilting his head upward. Even sitting on a wall, Demyx was short. Axel's eyes flashed in the sun, radiant green meeting gorgeous ice-blue. Axel leaned in slowly, hearing Demyx's quick breaths of anticipation. Slowly and carefully he pressed his full lips to Demyx's. The boy's eyes flew open, then closed slowly as he leaned into the sweet kiss, wrapping his arms around Axel's chest, the rest of the world melting into oblivion as Demyx lost himself to the growing sensation of fulfillment and warmth. The kiss lasted only moments, and Axel pulled away, a soft and glowing look on his face. Demyx stared up at him. His god, his world, his everything that ever was and ever would be.

"Can I kiss you again?" he asked deviantly. Axel laughed aloud, pulling Demyx into a tight, playful hug, kissing him passionately. Demyx twisted his fingers in Axel's soft hair, giggling against his lips, smiling in the heart he was fabled not to have. It was in that moment he knew beyond the shadow of a doubt...he had a heart. Axel's heart. And Axel had his.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Awwwww...

I love being a writer!

Reviews pls? k thnx bai!


	11. Not ready

Well, hello thurr!

We're on chapter...what is it now? 11? Yes...chapter 11.

I'm just blazin' through these, it's great.

I love having my inspiration back!

Maybe it has something to do with the copious amounts of Flamin' Hot Cheetos and cream cheese I've recently come into. Whatever...

A/N: One of my absolute favorite songs on repeat today! "Mien Schatz" by Oomph! (Ha ha... it's a German song/band.)

Disclaimer: My sister and I just had the conversation about what we would do if either of us _did_ own Kingdom Hearts (which we _don't_) and let's just say it wasn't pretty. It would basically be a giant Yaoi orgy featuring the boys of KH and the better looking characters of the Final Fantasy series.

-cough- Reno and Vincent Valentine -cough- ...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"**Not ready"**

Axel and Demyx walked back toward the marketplace now, hand in hand, to the small stand that sold cigarettes. There was a man behind the counter, large, burly and he looked irritated. Demyx strode up the the stand, asking for three packs of the strongest cigarettes available. Seeing the disapproving look on Axel's face, he changed the request to three packs of light cigarettes. Upon obtaining the goods, Axel and Demyx turned down an alley and went back to the Castle via the darkness.

Not much had changed since they'd left. Everyone was still on edge, some were still asleep and Marluxia kept shooting Saix nasty looks every time there was a twinge of pain in his arm. Demyx quickly unwrapped a pack of cigarettes, pulling out one long, thin cancer stick and put it to his lips, lighting it and inhaling slowly. The smoke slid down his throat, the menthol tickling a bit as it filled his lungs, the taste sticking to the back of his throat. He exhaled and looked at Axel through the cloud.

"I needed that." Demyx wheezed. Saix looked up from a nearby couch disapprovingly, but said nothing. Demyx swaggered over to the couch on the other side of the room and pressed a pack of cigarettes and a lighter into Vexen's hand.

"Zexion used to get my cigarettes for me..." Vexen said quietly, looking the pack over. Demyx nodded.

"I know." he whispered, taking a drag, blowing it out the corner of his mouth and away from Vexen. "I know."

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The usual quiet stillness of evening settled on the remaining members of the Organization. Throughout the day, they had spread to other parts of the Castle, though never far from the safety of the common area. In fact, the only ones left in the low-lit room were Axel, Demyx, Saix and Marluxia, who didn't do much moving nowadays. He claimed the jogging motion of his steps 'irritated his condition'. Demyx watched Saix absentmindedly pick at the scab forming on his cheek from Luxord's shuriken while he wondered about the dear old gambler's condition. He was beginning to talk more and move, though anyone waiting for more than three words out of him might want to pack a lunch. Demyx thought about poor Zexion and the pain and sadness left in the wake of his destruction. He seethed with anger, wanting nothing more than to find the person responsible and tear out his (or her) throat. If only Zexion had stayed in his room that night...

"Oh!" exclaimed Demyx suddenly. "Saix!"

Saix looked at him strangely.

"Yes, Demyx?" he asked slowly. Demyx leaned forward, motioning for Axel and Marluxia to do the same.

"I remember why Zexion was out of his room the other night!" he said. Axel thought for a moment.

"Wasn't it because he wanted to see if Saix could use his freaky mind-reading powers to see if any member of the Organization was behind the killings?" he asked, and Demyx nodded. Saix sighed and shook his head.

"That absolutely couldn't wait till morning?" he asked solemnly.

"You know how Zexion was..." said Marluxia, the word 'was' resonated in the backs of all the minds in the room.

"Yeah but..." Saix shook his head again, still-stained pieces of hair falling into his face. "I can't control what I see and he knew that. You don't think I've tried?" he asked no one in particular.

"You gotta admit, it was worth a shot." commented Axel.

Many more hours passed as members of the Organization walked in and out of the common area, all scared, all on edge, all suspicious of one another. Demyx couldn't help thinking that this was no way to live, whether you truly 'existed' or not. Finally, night came and all settled in for more uneasy sleep, shoving each other and bickering over blankets. Demyx begged Roxas to take Axel's place on guard for the night, and reluctantly, he agreed. Demyx practically pulsed with happiness as he settled onto the couch with Axel, who lay longways so Demyx could lay beside him. Demyx laid down, facing Axel, who wrapped his arm around Demyx and pulled him closer.

"Thank you." Demyx whispered in the dim light and relative silence. They were on the couch furthest from Luxord, Xaldin and Roxas who kept watch, and everyone around them was asleep. Axel sighed, his eyes shining with admiration for Demyx.

"For what?" he murmured softly.

"For today." Demyx answered, looking over Axel's face, memorizing every crease and plain for the millionth time. He was positive that not even Axel was aware of that small freckle on the side of his head, just below his ear. The red-haired god laughed lightly, brushing the loose strands of hair from Demyx's forehead.

"You don't have to thank me, beautiful." he whispered, kissing Demyx gently. They sat for a moment in blissful, loving silence before Demyx looked to Axel with terror in his eyes.

"I'm not ready to die." he said quietly. Axel's face fell.

"You won't, sweety. I promise." he soothed, but Demyx shook his head.

"You can't promise that, Axel." he whispered fearfully. Axel's eyes narrowed.

"Yes, I can. I promise that I'll protect you. Even if it means that I die, myself." he said sternly, putting more panic in Demyx's eyes.

"You can't die!" the sitarist said, a bit louder than intended, causing Xaldin and Roxas to stop chattering near the front of the room. Demyx winced, lowering his voice. "I'll have nothing left." he whimpered.

"But you will." insisted Axel, stroking Demyx's cheek. "You'll have yourself and that unbreakable will of yours."

"But I-..." began Demyx when a crash from the front of the room caught his attention and woke several of the sleeping Nobodies.

"Don't you ever fucking say that again!" shouted Luxord, pointing menacingly at Roxas whom he'd thrown into the wall. Saix sat up wearily in the bed he shared with Larxene, looking around to find the over-dramatic scene unfolding. He stumbled out of the bed and stood in front of Luxord, rumpled bed clothes and all, demanding to know just what the hell he was doing.

"That little punkass insulted my son! My _dead _son!" he spat, glaring at Roxas, who stood slowly, grabbing onto the wall for support and rubbing his head where he'd hit it, fighting tears of pain.

"So you threw him into a _wall_?" asked Saix.

"Yes, I threw him into a wall. You blame me?!" cried Luxord, who was clearly over-reacting. Saix sighed, shaking his head.

"I never should have signed up for this..." he muttered to himself. "Luxord, you're being irrational. I know this has been hard for you, but we're all trying to sleep..." he said as if talking to a small child and motioning to the Nobodies sprawled out on beds, couches and chairs behind him. "Now please, calm down."

"Don't fucking tell me to calm down!" Luxord shouted louder, this time waking Laxaeus and Vexen, who sat up irritably and rubbed their eyes. Saix raised both hands in surrender.

"No one's telling you what to do. I just think you should be calm. For the sake of everyone here. Please?" he said, again as if addressing one of low IQ.

"That's telling me what to do." Luxord sneered. He caught sight of Roxas attempting to stumble away from the wall on an ankle shattered from the impact with the wall, and roared "I'm not finished with you yet!"

Saix grabbed Luxord's wrist and held it tightly, putting the index finger of his other hand in Luxord's face like a mother scolding a child.

"Luxord, you're done. Go to bed." he commanded. Luxord narrowed his eyes, wrenching away from Saix's grasp.

"Don't touch me!" he cried, tears forming. Saix could tell he was just frustrated and tired. All the same...

"Luxord, I'm not gonna ask you again. Go lay down." he said sternly. "Please." he added, a bit softer this time. Luxord shut his eyes tightly, breathing slow to calm himself down.

"No." he finally said, though the anger had left his eyes. He regained his usual elite composure and stared Saix in the eyes. "Not here. Not with _him_!" he pointed at Roxas who had managed to limp his way over to a couch with the help of Vexen and Marluxia. He looked up at Vexen desperately, shaking his head as if to say 'I did nothing wrong'. Saix nodded.

"Alright fine. We'll keep you on separate sides of the room." he tried to mediate. Luxord shook his head.

"I'm going to sleep in _my_ room. Mine!" he bellowed at Saix before turning on his heel and exiting the common area. Saix stood for a while, massaging his temples irritably as he listened to Luxord's departing footsteps. Then he turned to Xaldin.

"How'd you like to earn some serious brownie points?" he smiled weakly at Xaldin who sat irked on the bed. He looked to Saix, then into his lap, and shrugged.

"What do I have to do?" he groaned, quite obviously preferring the measly rest he was getting over whatever task Saix had prepared for him.

"There will be no reasoning with Luxord tonight." he said, pointing out the obvious. "So I need someone to watch over him."

"I'm not staying in a room with him all night." Xaldin growled. "He'll wind up throwing something at me."

"I'm not asking you to sit on top of him. Just stay outside the door and keep watch. Listen for anything suspicious inside." Saix explained. Xaldin frowned, pinching the bridges of his nose with large fingers.

"Fine." he agreed softly.

"Thanks." breathed Saix, relieved that _someone_ was cooperating tonight. "Would you like someone to come stay on guard with you?" he asked. Xaldin considered this. With a brief glance around the room, he looked back to Saix.

"What about Larxene?" he inquired.

"Why her?" Saix asked. Xaldin lowered his voice.

"Because whatever malevolent force is inside the Castle will be warded off by her attitude." he mumbled. Saix grinned and called to Larxene, explaining the situation.

"I'm to babysit the babysitter?" she asked cockily. "What about the lesser Nobodies?" she demanded. An eerie quiet fell on the Organization when they realized that no one had seen even a hint of a Dusk since the Superior and Xigbar were murdered.

"Maybe it has something to do with the upsetting of the chain of command." Saix said out loud to himself.

"Whatever it is, it's freaking me out." Larxene murmured, speaking her mind on the issue for the first time. "We can't keep this up." she lowered her voice to a whisper. "And you know it. Find a solution, Saix. Tonight." her murmured plea weighed heavily on Saix's mind as he watched Larxene and Xaldin make their way down the hall to Luxord's room.

Saix slumped heavily onto the couch beside Roxas, who was rubbing his ankle, trying to make the swelling stop. Vexen was looking over it, shaking his head.

"What the hell did you say to him?" demanded Saix. Roxas looked up from his ankle at the man's golden eyes.

"I told him that Zexion shouldn't have betrayed your trust by telling the Superior about the girl. That's it! I was standing up for you!" he cried. Saix's eyes flickered away from Roxas, then back.

"You know that's a touchy subject with him..." he muttered.

"Yeah well the fucker didn't have to throw me into a wall." Roxas griped, returning to his task of rubbing out the swelling.

"I don't think Zexion told him..." Saix said truthfully. Roxas and Vexen leaned in, looking to Saix, knowing what he was going to say.

"So you think it was someone else? Someone in the Organization?"whispered Vexen. Saix nodded.

"I know it was."

While Saix and Luxord were busy fighting, and Roxas was crawling away with his injuries, Demyx had curled himself up beside Axel in fear. Not for himself, and not in that particular moment...but fear of knowing what was coming. It was far more than apparent by now that the Organization was falling apart. No one wanted to cooperate or look out for one another anymore. They were divided, leaderless and scared. And Larxene was right...where were the lesser Nobodies? Everyone could practically feel the malevolent presence, even if they would never openly admit that there were feelings that settled over them that would raise the hair on the back of their necks.

"Axel...?" Demyx whispered with fear.

"Yeah?" Axel whispered back. Demyx chose his next words carefully.

"We can't stay here." he said quietly. Axel said nothing, though he tensed against Demyx. "Please. Let's leave." Demyx begged.

"Dem, come on. Have some faith, alright? Saix is gonna fix this. We all are just..." Axel scrambled for words when Demyx pressed a finger to his soft lips.

"This is beyond Saix. Beyond any of us." he said truthfully. Axel again, said nothing. "You know it's true. Look at all of us!" Demyx cried. "We're all going to die if we stay here. I've been talking to Marluxia and Vexen. They agree with me." he said. Axel shot a dirty look in the direction of Vexen and Marluxia where they were tightly wrapping bits of fabric around Roxas's ankle to brace it.

"They don't know what they're talking about." Axel grumbled. Demyx propped himself up on one elbow and looked into Axel's shocking green eyes.

"You were saying the same thing just last night." he argued. So Demyx _had_ been awake...

"Dem, I don't want to argue with you, okay?" Axel pleaded. Demyx frowned and placed a hand on the side of Axel's face.

"I don't want to argue either..." he whispered. "But I'm scared."

"I know you're scared. We're all scared. But we're going to be fine." Axel insisted. Demyx looked around the room, his eyes locking on the small group of Nobodies clustered on another couch. He sighed.

"Fine. But if anything else happens, you have to promise me that we'll get out of here." Demyx begged. "Okay?"

Axel stared into Demyx's eyes, finding a fire there that he wasn't expecting.

"Alright. We'll leave. I promise." Axel whispered, taking Demyx's hand and kissing it gently.

The promise did little to ease Demyx's troubled mind. It's not that he didn't believe Axel. He did, really. He just feared that the next time something _did_ happen...it might be too late to get out.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I never thought I'd get that damn chapter done.

I hated that thing.

_Hated it!_

I'm just at a point in the story where I want to end it the way I had originally planned to, but at the same time, I know it's going to disappoint a lot of readers.

Plus I've been busy with starting up other stories. Two-parters and another epically long one as well.

Maybe I should try focusing?  
Ha.

Anyway...

Reviews?​


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